Introverts and extroverts

I love meeting people. I literally meet hundreds and at times, thousands of people every week. Unfortunately, I find it extremely difficult to remember names and faces.

Sometimes, when people tell me, “Hello Francis, don’t you remember me?” I would pull a Zig Ziglar line, twist it a little, and say, “I have a photographic memory but it is constantly low on battery.”

Before, I was a very shy person.

I hated meeting new people. In parties, I would often stay quiet in one corner, content with the silence. And in the same parties, I would see loud people. I hated their brashness. I wish they would go away. All these would probably label me as an “introvert.”

Before, our society celebrated and valued quiet behavior and deep introspection. The protocol was to not speak unless spoken to and only if necessary. To put it simply, don’t talk and listen. And so I was safe.

Today’s culture is totally different. A strong personality is celebrated. An animated person with a loud voice commands attention. The modern day celebrity is one who speaks loud, speaks fast and simply speaks too much. These are the people we label as “extroverts.”

I used to think that extroverts had the upper hand because they were often heard and introverts could not accomplish much because they were shy and quiet. I was wrong.

Albert Einstein, Mahatma Gandhi, Warren Buffet and many other celebrated public figures were actually introverts.

Introverts think first before they actually speak. This is how they are hard-wired to do things. They are usually pushed back to the background while their counterparts seize the center stage and start the show. Introverts want to think, plan and prepare. Extroverts just want to dive into action straightaway.

If this situation is not addressed, then many business organizations miss out many great creative ideas that remain introspective.

Please do not get me wrong. I am not an expert in this field and I’m not claiming to be right all the time, but I do notice things and here they are.

Introverts – like me in my earlier days – gain energy through isolation.

People who are loud zap my energy and they irritate me. And because my energy is diminishing, I need to withdraw and find a quiet place where I can recharge.

Extroverts get their energy by being around people, but lose energy when they find themselves in isolation. Rather than spending time in quiet introspection, they derive their energy through interaction with other people. They get ideas from these people and these ideas stimulate their thinking and make them speak more.

Ideas are the currencies for the future.

Allow me to present some suggestions that would help both introverts and extroverts make use of creative ideas that can help improve the business.

1. Always prepare an agenda for the meeting ahead of time.  This is to provide adequate time for the introverts to think about the items. This will also direct the extroverts from wandering into other unrelated topics. Let everybody know the duration of the meeting and follow it.

2. Make sure that you allow every person enough time to express their ideas and opinions.

3. Really listen to what each person is saying. Take down notes and respect every person’s ideas and opinions.

I used to be shy and withdrawn. I still am sometimes, but I have learned to overcome it.

Now I enjoy meeting new people, learning from them and developing friendships along the way.

We can always improve, but it takes a lot of humility to know that we must.

I like the person who said, “Of course you and I can change. We are not trees.”

Guess what? Even trees change.

(Spend two life-transforming days with Francis Kong learning leadership and life skills as he present Level Up Leadership on November 18-19 at EDSA Shangri-La Hotel. For further inquiries, contact Inspire at 09158055910 or call 632-6310912 for details.)