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Etiquette for Pinoy churchgoers | Philstar.com
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Sunday Lifestyle

Etiquette for Pinoy churchgoers

- Tingting Cojuangco -
For parishioners and its visitors, even foreigners, too, mortar, limestones, sand, rocks, egg shells and white claire have made it as breathtaking as the church of Loboc, Bohol, a destination to marvel at or reaffirm our faith as Roman Catholics. Centuries ago the Jesuits arrived in Bohol followed by the Agustinian Recollects. They set sail from Spain believing it was the will of God that they enlighten the minds of King Philip II’s new subjects through the gospel that would lead them towards eternal truths and sanctity.
* * *
Our pretty Boholana guide said, pointing to the replica of St. Blaise, "We lost St. Blaise and Ricky Jose found him in an antique store in Manila. He was returned to us only to lose him to church robbers for the second time. We found him and again he was stolen and returned. The parish decided to keep him in its upper floor."

There is an empty 16th-century-curved niche, saintless among seven images. "St. Anthony used to be there. St. Monica on the other side of the altar. They were stolen just three weeks ago." I never thought "my favorite" would send me a message in far Bohol. "Over there," our guide said. High heels echoing across the Church’s apse, I saw the dark little empty cove, creating another void in the church dark, lonely, antiquated. Seeing the Church and its museum of church vestments and silver liturgical items sent me floating away. Remembering its beauty and strength, we rushed into the home of a Cebu carver, Nanette Garcia and Ninette Homecillo with me. Vic Gulane was his name and he knew exactly what we wanted. In three weeks he promised us, the Baclayon Church would have St. Anthony back on its side altar. However, we’d accept more St. Anthony statues for those who wish to help us propagate his purity.
* * *
During the early period of the Spanish occupation, the friars commanded the residents of Bohol to live in places where they could hear the sound of the bells. "Bajo las campanas." Once settled, the headman or the gobernadorcillo (petty chief) or the cabeza de barangay (barangay captain) presented a list of young men who could be tasked as laborers for the construction of the church, convent or the escuela municipal (municipal school). All this, under the supervision of the parish priest.

Men had to gather sand and stones, cut timber while women were asked to bring eggs to be used for plastering bricks, hewn stones and walls. This kind of labor was called polo y servicio, forced labor, and required of every qualified male in the barangay or municipality.

The diocese of Bohol was under the archdiocese of Cebu, which was under the patronage of the Most Holy Name of Jesus, created by Pope Clement VIII through a bull, Super Specula Militantis Ecclesiae, dated August 26, 1595. The first bishop of Cebu was Fray Pedro Agurto of the Order of Saint Augustine. This Cebu diocese was the most extensive of the four dioceses in the Philippines. It included under its jurisdiction the Visayan Islands, Mindanao and the Marianas Islands.

Awed, we praised the Agustinians Recollects, Jesuits, Dominicans who caused to build magnificent churches and leaving us the legacy of our faith and Filipino traditions. This massive stone edifice that still houses in the 21st century the gentlest of saints, Blessed Mother, her Son and our God. Entering these structures made us feel lofty and left us wondering why can’t churches like this be built today in spite of our advanced technology...and why can’t people respect the house of God?
* * *
That idea led me to write about church etiquette. We learn table manners, party protocol and correct conduct. Why not proper church behavior?

In the House of God, dress appropriately. Shorts, mini skirts and blouses with plunging necklines or T-shirts that bear the tummy...any and all overly casual attires should be avoided. T-shirts are acceptable but please choose one without blatant slogans imprinted on them. In yesteryear before people went to church, they would take a bath and would wear crisp-ironed clothes reserved for Sunday.

When entering the church pass by the holy font, dip your finger in holy water, pass it to the person next to you as a gesture of brotherhood.

I know of some people who wear new clothes to church before making it their daily wear. It is their way of thanking the Lord for the things they can buy and own.

Every man should remove his hat or cap when he enters the church.

Years ago women wore delicate lace veils in submission to God’s will once they entered His house. Vatican II removed that elegant habit. In the ’50s and ’60s anyone with sleeveless blouse was not given holy communion.

Don’t dress for the day thinking of church as a side trip to going to the mall or going to a party. It should be the main agenda and the center of a schedule. Activities before or after the Mass are mere extras. Be prompt. Don’t be late for Mass as sometimes high heels click on the floor and break people’s focus.

Plan your schedule well. Arrive for the opening and stay until the final hymn, each part of the Mass is important. And be reminded...going to Mass is like going to the movies, when you’re late you must attend the next Mass until the part you’ve missed.

Before entering the church, turn off your cell phones. The world won’t miss you for an hour. Maybe less. If you’re expecting a life or death situation call, at the very least, put your phone on mute. Cell phones have been the common cause of disruption, not to mention irritation during Mass.

Don’t linger at the entrance of the church either. This makes it difficult for others to enter the door. Go in and make the sign of the cross. It is an expression of our faith in the crucified Lord. Don’t make the sign of the cross if you just fling your hand around carelessly.

If you have to pass the center aisle, make the proper reverence. Make the sign of the cross, slowly genuflect or at least bow your head in respect to the tabernacle. Some genuflect partially. I see it as a sign of laziness or forgetfulness of the proper way to genuflect and signifying disrespect. If your right knee can’t touch the floor, just reverently bow your head. If the Blessed Sacrament is exposed, kneel – both knees must touch the floor. When you enter your home or someone else’s home, you greet the occupants respectfully. Respect God as you enter His house.

Choose the pew you want to occupy in silence. When you’ve chosen a seat, don’t take up space you don’t need. If you prefer to sit near the aisle, stand up to make room for others who wish to pass in front of you to sit in the empty space beside you.

If you’re late for Mass, wait for the right moment to enter the church. Move forward quietly, without pushing those infront of you who are praying. Better yet use the back entrance where you’ll be least distracting, then search for an empty seat by the back. When you’ve found one, choose the right time to go down the aisle, preferably when the congregation is asked to stand up for a song or prayer. Excuse yourself politely if there is person seated by the pew. If there are no empty pews left, quietly find a place to stand, so as not to disturb others.

The church is not a place for idle conversation. Even if the Mass has not started, talk only in whispers...that is, if you need to talk at all. Use the time before the Mass to collect your thoughts for prayer...or at least, give others their chance to do so.

Beware of talking and laughing in church. You have 23 hours to do that outside the church. Avoid public displays of affection, boisterous movements and other disruptive behavior. Chewing gum, eating or drinking during Mass is unacceptable unless you are a five-year-old child or younger, being kept quiet by a mother. Besides disturbing others in their prayer is a sign of great disrespect for God and fellow parishioners.

Please stand well and be attentive. Do not turn around to see who’s in church and watch others pray. During services the more devout might sometimes cry in prayer or anguish. Be respectful of their privacy and don’t stare nor laugh at them. If your thoughts stray from prayer, strive to bring them back and concentrate on the services.

During the Mass, one should not move about venerating saint’s icons or buying candles and offering them. The time for this is before or after the Mass. Let’s join the congregation in prayers and song.

Restrain young children if you take them into the church with you. Pack little bags containing things that can keep them still like picture books about Jesus, noiseless toys. Don’t allow them to walk aimlessly around the church or play in the aisles. If you have a restless child, sit very close to him. Better yet stay in the last pew by the door. He will be least disturbing there. You can also promise them an after-church treat on occasion for good behavior. That usually works.

If there is a missalette available, hold it well. Avoid crumpling it and don’t turn it into an origami project. Leave it at the end of the pew for the next group of churchgoers to take or for easy collection by the church staff.

Hold the hand of the stranger beside you while singing the Our Father (with its many versions. I can claim being master to only one) and sincerely smile around in "Peace be with you."

Kneel if you want during the consecration...or stand up straight head bowed. Please don’t sit down unless you are ill.

Finally, coming to the services on time is as important as not leaving until its completion. Unless there are extremely compelling circumstances requiring you to leave earlier, stay in your seat until the procession has left the altar. No one should leave the church before the end of the divine service, especially during the holiest moments of the liturgy. I remember my grandfather would walk around San Agustin Church’s premises during the gospel and return when the sermon was over. The sermons then were delivered by the Spanish priests on their pulpits. The sermons then were long lectures that rumbled on and on putting us to sleep.

If you decide to "walk" down the aisle on two knees, do try to do it in a quiet church, not during Mass. If you see someone doing that from the back towards the altar, don’t stare. It is a way of atonement, request, sacrifice. I actually miss the sight of that penitence.

Our Catholic Church brings us all together as one – I believe it is only in the church that we are truly equal, the rich and the poor, the educated and illiterate, male and female, young and old. Here, we stand as His children. Matthew 18:19-20 said, "For where two or three are gathered together in My name, I am there in the midst of them...Anything that they ask, it will be done for them by My Father in Heaven." Therefore approach the priest after Mass, take his hand and respectfully touch it to your forehead. Let all your kids do the same.

There are 168 hours in one week. We need only an hour each week for Mass and to greet the celebrant. The Eucharistic Celebration is, after all, the core of our Roman Catholic Worship. Amen!

Merry Christmas.

vuukle comment

AGUSTINIAN RECOLLECTS

AGUSTINIANS RECOLLECTS

BACLAYON CHURCH

BOHOL

CEBU

CENTER

CHURCH

DON

MASS

ST. ANTHONY

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