A funny thing happened in heavy traffic

Last December, on my way to Manila to run some last-minute Christmas errands, I got stuck in heavy traffic at the corner of South Super Highway and Quirino Avenue. You know how horrendous traffic can get during the holiday rush. Despite the cool weather, people were hotheaded, agitated, and in a hurry. To while the time away and to ease my hunger, I ate a banana – a plump lacatan, my favorite variety.

I usually bring a recycled supermarket plastic bag in my car where I toss all my trash – candy wrappers, used tissues, unneeded receipts, etc., but the day before, I had my car washed and vacuumed so it got emptied of all the paraphernalia I usually stuff it with. So, here I was in the middle of traffic holding a banana peel in my hand without a trash bag in my car to pitch it in.

I had an internal argument with myself whether to throw or keep the peel and I heard me say, "It’s only a banana peel. It is biodegradable and will disintegrate, and will even be a great fertilizer after it dries up." So I pressed the automatic window winder and nonchalantly flung the peel out to the island in the middle of the road. Then I closed the window and kept an eye on the road, waiting for the traffic to move.

I was about to turn on my radio when I heard a strong knock on my car’s window. A man had picked up the banana peel, knocked to get my attention, and proceeded to go back to his car with MY banana peel! I was peeved and extremely embarrassed at the same time! (Here I was, regularly pontificating in my column against littering and the throwing away of trash just anywhere, caught red-handed and feeling as guilty as a bartender with a wet moustache!) I called the guy back and signaled him to return the banana peel. He handed it to me and I threw it on the car floor.

I started to talk to the universe (like I often do!) saying, "I just did this once! How dare you (the universe) send someone to check on me! It’s unfair! Why not do it to those who throw litter every day?"

I was completely amused and astounded at how instantaneously the universe responded to my little misdemeanor. I looked back at the guy and saw him enter his car three vehicles away from me.

What happened was, the man saw me throw the banana peel and must have been totally enraged by my inconsiderate act. He got out of his car, picked up the litter, called my attention to the fact that he picked it up, and was about to bring it to his car! He deemed it better to have his car dirtied by my trash rather than leave the unsightly litter on the South Superhighway!

I could not forgive myself. As the traffic moved, the guy overtook my car and I flashed my best repentant smile to him while making the thumbs up sign. I wanted him to know that what he did was commendable and, best of all, the right thing to do. He also made the thumbs up sign as if to say, "It’s okay" but I am not sure if he smiled. He could have thought (and I don’t blame him!), "Stupid a–hole!"

I tried to look at his plate number because right there and then, I knew that I would soon write about the incident in my column to thank and acknowledge him for bringing me back to my wits. I only caught the letter "H." Anyway, his car was a red bantam vehicle.

To that one-in-a-million guy who picked up my litter that afternoon, I would like to thank you for waking me up to shake me off my awful "typically Pinoy" habit of inconsiderate littering. I am so glad that there are Filipinos who still care for the environment and would do everything in their power to right a wrong. You have set a great example, pare. Sana lahat ng Pinoy kagaya mo! May your tribe increase! (If you were the guy, e-mail me, please.)

What happened wasn’t really "funny" at all. That incident, in fact, catalyzed the formation of the first change in my Philippine Quiet Revolution (PQR) campaign – "Zero Litter." We have to tell everybody not to throw litter anywhere no matter how small. You can always pocket your trash and dispose of it properly later.

* * * Why Philippine Traffic Is A Mess

Recently, at a reunion dinner with some college buddies, we talked about Philippine traffic. It is a known fact that traffic in the Philippines, especially in the urban areas and more so during the holidays, is a disgusting mess.

"Why is it that when Filipinos are abroad, they follow traffic rules but when they are in the Philippines, they don’t?" remarked Dinky Einsiedel, regional coordinator, Urban Management Program, Bangkok.

"Could it be because Filipinos are not team players?" asked architect Onie Mayo. "We don’t act as one team. Kanya-kanya..."

"We are looking for a simple solution to a very complicated problem. We were never united from the start. Just the geographical separation of our islands is a big deterrent enough for unification.," declared Ely Tuason, balikbayan from Chicago.

"But Filipinos followed rules during martial law," retorted Einsiedel.

"Out of fear!" answered Tuason. "In contrast, Americans do things because it is the right thing to do."

"Plus they were born into it, into the order of things. Like one time while I was driving around with a Japanese friend, I threw a candy wrapper out of my car window. My friend gasped and said that in Japan they don’t litter like that. I asked him why, in an effort to find a solution for our incurable Filipino habit of littering. He replied, ‘It just is not done!’" remarked Dero.

"It is a matter of law enforcement," suggested Einsiedel.

"But then again, there is corruption. Also, though we refuse to admit it, we do have a lot of uneducated drivers," remarked Dero. "And you can buy your driver’s license and get it without taking the exam!"

"Have you heard of the blind guy who was able to get a driver’s license? That’s the height!" chuckled Einsiedel.

"Everyone and everything are inter-connected. From the drivers to the license agencies to the policemen and the pedestrians; from arrogance to bribery to walang pakialam. We are one microcosm," proclaimed Mayo.

"We have to show people the advantages of not littering, of following traffic rules so they will see that they are the ones who will benefit in the end," volunteered Dero.

"Hmmm. Good luck!" smiled Alex Villaflor, antique dealer/collector. "Let’s have dessert!"

* * *

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