What's up for the New Year

We have different names for them. Many people I know call them resolutions. Others call them goals or benchmarks. Some just call them “plans.” But no matter what we call them, whatever those resolutions are, fact remains that there is a vital distinction between fantasies and desires.

As we enter the New Year, we naturally look into the future, imagine new possibilities and anticipate bigger opportunities. And we entertain some fantasies.

What are fantasies? We’ve all had them – winning the lottery, discovering gold in our backyard, moving to our beach house in Boracay in the blink of an eye, or coming up with a unique invention that would rake in tons and tons of money. We use fantasies to relieve stress, and give ourselves a bit of pleasure and momentary joy. Daydreaming is good too! It’s part of the creative process. But we need to realize that few of them will ever come true. In most cases, we don’t even want them to come true!

We don’t pursue fantasies, and we don’t develop the skills to turn our fantasies into reality. Fantasies are simply movies we play in our heads. For that purpose, they are perfect.

Desires, on the other hand, come from a place deep in our hearts. They are more challenging, more practical and, in some ways, less exciting than fantasies. Our desires are the things we truly want in our lives. They are the commitments we make, the investments we venture into, the effort we exert, the actions we take, the skills we learn and the strategies we develop. Our desires and aspirations are the things we work for. Knowing the distinction between fantasies and desires is essential both to enjoy our fantasies and to realize our desires. Some people confuse the two, so they get stuck. Remember the old joke about the man who prayed everyday for God to give him the winning lottery ticket? He died, went to heaven and demanded to know why God never answered his prayer. After a moment’s pause, God replied, “Well, it would have made my job a lot easier if you’d at least bought a ticket!”

Fantasies are healthy tension-relievers that most of us enjoy, but they achieve little or nothing. Desires, on the other hand, are tension creators!

Desires and aspirations remind us of the difference between where we are and where we want to be. They challenge us to become more, learn more, grow more, accomplish more and contribute more to our world.

Desire makes us restless. It drives us to take risks, to experiment, and sometimes, to say exactly the right thing at precisely the opportune moment. Desire confronts us with our own potential.

Desire keeps us awake at night and drives us all day long. Desire creates fire and passion. It creates an impatient eagerness, and it challenges us to find solutions!

Desire is the source of energy, passion and hope. It is the fire that creates success. Your deepest desires are the basis for New Year’s resolutions that are NOT forgotten or abandoned.

When fantasy and desire are confused, people set their goals too far off. Their goals become unrealistic, and neither they nor anyone else is excited about them because no one expects those goals to come true. It has nothing to do with the actual size of the goal; it has everything to do with the distinction between fantasy and desire.

To make 2012 your best year ever, have the courage to identify, write down and honor your deepest desires and your highest aspirations. Get very hungry, very eager, very determined. Use your desires to create workable plans – then work your plans!

Times are not easy and the road ahead looks very challenging. Drop the fantasies and concentrate on the desire aspects of your life. Helen Keller says, “Life is either a daring adventure or nothing. To keep our faces toward change and behave like free spirits in the presence of fate is strength undefeatable.” And Amelia Earhart says, “I want to do it because I want to do it.”

And in all our pursuits of our desires, never forget to seek God’s will and timing. After all, He holds the future.

(My thanks to Philip Humbert for inspiring me with this material.)

(Attend “Winning Disciplines for Success” Feb. 24, 2012 at the SMX Convention Center! Learn best practices on business, creative, physical, intellectual, emotional and spiritual disciplines from the industry’s best: Butch Jimenez, Dyan Castillejo, Jeric Soriano, Paul Soriano and Francis Kong. For further inquiries, contact Inspire Leadership Consultancy Inc. at 632-6872614 or 09178511115.)