Handling criticism

An established painter is exhibiting his work and a young wannabe critic is attending. The critic looks around and finds the artist, saying: “Do you want my opinion on your art?” The artist, of course, says “yes.”

The critic replies, “it’s worthless.” And the classic retort of the painter was: “I know. But tell me anyway.” But the critic walks away.

Here is a question for you: What did Beethoven do when he got destructive criticism?

The answer is: He turned a deaf ear to them.

When I come across materials like these, I laugh a little and think a lot. I remember the time when I was in a conversation with a leader of a faith-based organization. He said: “Each one of us is gifted. God has blessed us with a talent as a gift that is uniquely ours.” And then he turned to me and asked: “What is yours, Francis?” He had a big laugh when I told him, “I have been blessed with the gift of criticism.” This incident reminds me of an old material I have kept in my files. The story has given me a very positive outlook on how to handle criticisms.

In my line of work, standard practice is for clients to hand out evaluation sheets for the attendees’ feedback. It sounds all technical and fancy, but it is a mechanism to have the attendees criticize the presentation. I have had tons of very positive feedback and am thankful for the audience’s kindness. However, I would get highly interested in looking at the negative feedback because such critiques can point out my faults and weaknesses, allowing me to improve and elevate my craft. Here is the story that has helped me develop this kind of mindset.

Ole Bull was the famous Norwegian violinist of the past century.

His father, a chemist, sent him to the University of Christiania to study for the ministry and forbade him to play his beloved violin. He flunked out and devoted all his time and energy to the violin, defying his father. Although talented, his teachers were unskilled. By the time he was ready to start the concert tour, he lacked the necessary skills to perform well.

In Italy, a Milan newspaper critic wrote: “He is an untrained musician. If he is a diamond, he is undoubtedly in the rough and unpolished.

Ole Bull could have reacted to that criticism and been infuriated by it. But he chose to take the criticism positively and was determined to become better with it. He went to the newspaper office and asked to see the critic. He spent the evening with the 70-year-old critic, asked about his faults, and sought the older man’s advice on correcting them.

Then he canceled the rest of his tour, returned home, and spent the next six months studying under excellent and able teachers. Ole practiced hours upon hours to overcome his faults. Finally, he returned to his concerts and, when only 26, became the sensation of Europe.

While Michelangelo was working on St. Peter’s Cathedral, he was criticized by some of the men working on the building. They didn’t like what they saw, and they told him so.

The great artist responded. “Even if I were able to make my plans and ideas clear to you – which I am not – I am not obliged to do so. I must ask you to do your best to help me, and when the work is complete, the conception will be better understood.” History has confirmed that he was right. Those who found fault with his work were doing so out of ignorance. Not understanding the artist’s mind, they couldn’t see the whole picture and complete design.

A person with a “defensive mindset” would take criticism as a personal attack against him. This person goes out all-defensive and closes all possibilities of improvement, and then digs in and doubles down on current ways, refusing to budge or change. A person with a “positive mindset” says, “Everybody has blind spots, and it takes somebody else to point it out to me. Now that the weak spots have been revealed, I will work hard on improving and change for the better.”

English author and journalist Will Self say it beautifully: “A creative life cannot be sustained by approval any more than it can be destroyed by criticism.” Accept the criticisms of the experts. They have the right to point out our weak spots. But as to those who are expert wannabe’s who merely enjoy the sport of criticizing, play the part of Beethoven, and you know what I mean.

(Francis Kong’s highly acclaimed Level Up Leadership Master Class online will have its final run for the year from Nov. 17 to 19. For inquiries and reservations, contact April at +63928-559-1798 or and for more information, visit www.levelupleadership.ph)