Of Valentine and Other Hazards
February 14, 2003 | 12:00am
Okay, so I’m one of the jaded, cynical singles who want Valentine’s Day to pass by like a whiff of cheap perfume: strong enough to notice but annoying enough to dismiss. However, with couples on a high on this day of hearts, my wish would be up right up there with getting a Ferrari for Christmas. I suppose I will just have to grin and bear it – after all, it only happens once a year and I have gotten by without a date for close to a decade.
What a way to start a Valentine’s Day article. Griping is a single woman’s way of coping with schmaltz and this is in no way an attempt to undermine the glee that couples feel when they do their thing on V day. So in order not to turn the coupled population off, I will enumerate the great things about being with someone. And coming from a yet-to-be-found other half like me, that would make quite an interesting read, wouldn’t it? Indulge me while I torture myself.
A good thing about having a significant other is you can have someone to drag to the movies whenever you’re bored stiff. You can share your popcorn with someone who would ideally not complain if you put too much salt in it. You can later have coffee and discuss the merits or minus points of the movie and marvel at how Rob Scheider can bark like a dog with such panache. Gee, my cynicism is still showing. Oops.
You also have someone who will call you every two hours or so, just to check how you are and how your day is going. Of course, this is his or her sole purpose. Saying "hi" and "how are you". How dare you think that s/he is being suspicious? Having an affair with the photocopier operator is farthest from your mind – and from your partner’s – so that is definitely NOT a reason to call. Bear that in mind.
Another wonderful thing about couplehood is that you cannot and should not talk or even look at a person of the opposite sex while you are with your paramour. Can you imagine how complicated your life would be if every attractive being in the bar catches your gaze? That would be like picking the reddest apple from the basket, so confusing, time-consuming and exhausting. You have your apple, now eat it.
You have someone to run to when you run out of cash. A ready ATM at your disposal. We all have our moments of need and when they come, there’s boyfriend/girlfriend to the rescue. Convenient, isn’t it? As for your OTHER needs, those would be taken care of, too. How wonderful!
And then there’s the person who will go and bring your fruits and flowers when you get sick, someone who will hold your hand and comfort you when your pet dog dies, someone who will listen to your endless haranguing about the way your boss trashed your concept during a crucial brainstorming session.
S/he will not care whether you’re fat or thin, dark or fair, moody or bubbly. S/he will just love you, just the way you are and it won’t matter whether you have flabby arms or an emaciated figure. All s/he will see is the good in you and, if the relationship doesn’t work out, all s/he will remember is way you made him or her laugh…
I got sidetracked back there.
I guess what we all want is to love and be loved in return. Life is filled with funny surprises that oftentimes has you for a punchline. Whether you’re single or with someone, recently engaged or recently dumped, Valentine’s Day is a time to enjoy the goodness that love brings. Even jaded and cynical singles like me will lighten up and have fun today.
What a way to start a Valentine’s Day article. Griping is a single woman’s way of coping with schmaltz and this is in no way an attempt to undermine the glee that couples feel when they do their thing on V day. So in order not to turn the coupled population off, I will enumerate the great things about being with someone. And coming from a yet-to-be-found other half like me, that would make quite an interesting read, wouldn’t it? Indulge me while I torture myself.
A good thing about having a significant other is you can have someone to drag to the movies whenever you’re bored stiff. You can share your popcorn with someone who would ideally not complain if you put too much salt in it. You can later have coffee and discuss the merits or minus points of the movie and marvel at how Rob Scheider can bark like a dog with such panache. Gee, my cynicism is still showing. Oops.
You also have someone who will call you every two hours or so, just to check how you are and how your day is going. Of course, this is his or her sole purpose. Saying "hi" and "how are you". How dare you think that s/he is being suspicious? Having an affair with the photocopier operator is farthest from your mind – and from your partner’s – so that is definitely NOT a reason to call. Bear that in mind.
Another wonderful thing about couplehood is that you cannot and should not talk or even look at a person of the opposite sex while you are with your paramour. Can you imagine how complicated your life would be if every attractive being in the bar catches your gaze? That would be like picking the reddest apple from the basket, so confusing, time-consuming and exhausting. You have your apple, now eat it.
You have someone to run to when you run out of cash. A ready ATM at your disposal. We all have our moments of need and when they come, there’s boyfriend/girlfriend to the rescue. Convenient, isn’t it? As for your OTHER needs, those would be taken care of, too. How wonderful!
And then there’s the person who will go and bring your fruits and flowers when you get sick, someone who will hold your hand and comfort you when your pet dog dies, someone who will listen to your endless haranguing about the way your boss trashed your concept during a crucial brainstorming session.
S/he will not care whether you’re fat or thin, dark or fair, moody or bubbly. S/he will just love you, just the way you are and it won’t matter whether you have flabby arms or an emaciated figure. All s/he will see is the good in you and, if the relationship doesn’t work out, all s/he will remember is way you made him or her laugh…
I got sidetracked back there.
I guess what we all want is to love and be loved in return. Life is filled with funny surprises that oftentimes has you for a punchline. Whether you’re single or with someone, recently engaged or recently dumped, Valentine’s Day is a time to enjoy the goodness that love brings. Even jaded and cynical singles like me will lighten up and have fun today.
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