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Smiling through the tears

ARMY OF ME - The Philippine Star

The Fault In Our Stars has been drawing audiences in droves despite its promise of an unhappy ending. The film adaptation of John Green’s immensely popular novel features Shailene Woodley and Ansel Elgort as terminally ill high schoolers trying to cram in a lifetime of true love while negotiating inevitable physical decline. Festooned with snappy dialogue and believable acting, the teen tearjerker is a generously spirited tribute to the resilience of the young human spirit. My heartstrings needed tugging, and while I expected to be completely drained of joie de vivre, I came out of the cinema with a large smile on my face.

It’s amusing that people pay money to watch strangers endure a combination of tragedy and triumph on the big screen. Surely we have enough drama of our own. But everyone needs a good cry once in a while, and sad movies help us work through, and possibly overcome, unresolved grief and trauma.

Crying References

As a child, I never imagined that cartoons could ever be depressing. Since my mother passed away a few years ago, however, certain animated pictures I once deemed innocuous now leave me sobbing in increasingly uncontrollable heaves. Disney’s Bambi, for instance, has become a standard movie crying reference for good reason. The death of Bambi’s mom at the hands of a hunter, quite traumatic when you’re little, is just as unbearable when you’re older.

A similar scene in The Land Before Time — when Littlefoot’s mother lies dying on the ground and tells her son, “I’ll be with you, even if you can’t see me,” along with Diana Ross singing If We Hold On Together — never fail to get my tear ducts flowing. As Carl Jung said, “One does not become enlightened by imagining figures of light, but by making the darkness conscious.”

Inspiring Individuals

Truly moving motion pictures tread the line between upbeat and melancholy and evoke universal yet personal experiences — different for each individual yet somehow the same in their broad strokes. Some films elicit strong reactions from us not through the sorrowful procession of events they present but by the sheer goodness of their protagonists. Richard Dreyfuss’s fictional music professor in Mr. Holland’s Opus is an avatar for all the wonderful teachers I had in grade school, when I was the most wide-eyed and the least cynical. The ending of Dead Poets Society likewise reminds me of the kind of tribute these inspiring individuals deserve but so very rarely get.

Sadness is a blessing: After watching Bambi, just think: Have you hugged your mom today?

According to a study by Ohio State University, “Tragic stories often focus on themes of eternal love, and this leads viewers to think about their loved ones and count their blessings.” Whether it’s Beaches, My Girl or The Book Thief, indulging in something maudlin, bittersweet and sentimental can lead us to feel grateful for the ways our circumstances and relationships are better than those of the characters on screen.

Moments of Lightness

While The Fault In Our Stars didn’t cause as much grief as I had steeled myself for, it still managed to coax a few quiet sniffles. You may have read the book — or at least know how it generally goes — but that doesn’t necessarily mean that key moments and plot twists land with any less force in the film version.

This tale of star-crossed lovers shows cancer-stricken teenagers going along as best they can, despite things having lost their shine. Ultimately, when you sense the need for some catharsis, it’s best to lose yourself in a sad movie in more or less the same way Hazel Grace Lancaster and Augustus Waters lived their short lives: accept the whole thing — the sorrow as well as the fleeting pleasures and moments of lightness — then expel the pent-up emotions you have been harboring.

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AS CARL JUNG

BAMBI

BOOK THIEF

CRYING REFERENCES

DEAD POETS SOCIETY

DIANA ROSS

FAULT IN OUR STARS

HAZEL GRACE LANCASTER AND AUGUSTUS WATERS

IF WE HOLD ON TOGETHER

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