Ruffa Gutierrez speaks her truth on love and marriage

After 21 years, Ruffa Gutierrez returns to GMA Network to star in the TV series “Beauty Empire” alongside Barbie Forteza and Kyline Alcantara. Her last acting project on the Kapuso channel was “Habang Kapiling Ka” with Zoren Legaspi.

Ruffa’s guest appearance on my 20-minute program, “Fast Talk with Boy Abunda” proved that she still speaks her mind clearly and truthfully about her life, love and career.

The Miss World 1993 second runner-up didn’t falter when I mentioned the presence of Herbert Bautista in her life. I asked if they are planning to get married or if they’re living together.

“I don’t believe in live-in,” began Ruffa. “Kaya ‘yung mga relasyon ko nag-tatagal because there’s space. You’re excited to see each other. If every day gumigising ka na siya ‘yung katabi mo, parang, oh my gosh. My longest relationship was seven years, and I haven’t gone beyond that yet. But with Herbert, well, we’re going through a bump right now, and we’re not speaking. So, let’s see if that bump will last or we’ll speak again. I don’t know.

“Well, I’ve also been busy, and he has other things to take care of, as well, when it comes to personal matters. So, maybe this is a good time because it’s been five years since we met again on the set of a project we did. Five years is a good space to see if we will continue or stop.”

Ruffa shows her slimmer and sexier form.

Ruffa and Herbert have known each other since they were teenagers. But no sparks flew between them then.

“When he first met me, I was only 13 years old. I was still wearing glasses; my hair was curly. Hindi ko siya pinapansin. Hindi rin niya ako pinapansin. We were just co-stars,” she recalled.

Ruffa continued, “And then I remember when I was 17, he gave me a book. He told me to read it. Sabi n’ya, ‘Maganda ‘yan para ‘pag tinanong ka sa Q&A sa Miss World, makakasagot ka.’ So, ako naman, my gosh, may pictures ba ito?

“I forgot what the book was. But that’s Herbert. So, even if we’re going through a little bump right now, I will always treasure our precious moments because he’s the one who encouraged me to study.”

Ruffa admitted that their bond, while enduring, has faced its fair share of challenges. Despite the “little bump right now,” she expressed gratitude for the profound influence Herbert has had on her personal development, particularly in rekindling her passion for learning.

“I learned a lot from him. And for that, I’m very thankful. I remember telling (Herbert) I was having a tough time. Parang hindi niya ako pinansin for a few days kasi gusto niya talaga mag-aral ako kasi sabi niya matalino ka, kaya mo ‘yan,” shared Ruffa, who graduated with a bachelor’s degree in communication arts from the Philippine Women’s University (PWU) under its Expanded Tertiary Education Equivalency and Accreditation Program in 2022. She is currently pursuing a master’s degree in the same school.

The author with the ‘Beauty Empire’ star during his ‘Fast Talk with Boy Abunda’ on GMA.

“Ang kulang na lang is a thesis,” said Ruffa. This commitment to learning, which the actress has wholeheartedly embraced, has also inspired her daughters, Lorin and Venice, with her former husband Yilmaz Bektas, to prioritize their education.

Lorin and Venice also see how their mom has been working hard. “I could’ve just like, I don’t know, gone off with some rich guy and never had to work in my life. Pero lagi kong ginagamit ‘yung puso ko in everything, not just in relationships but in everything that I do. So, I want to instill in them the value of hard work and education.”

I asked Ruffa if Lorin and Venice like Herbert, to which she replied, “They love him.”

Before the “little bump,” were they talking about marriage?

“Marriage is very difficult. I don’t know yet if I’m ready for that step. Herbert’s also not ready. I think what’s more important, rather than discussing marriage, is, you know, looking for someone who will be your best friend, soulmate and lifetime partner. Hindi naman ibig sabihin pag kinasal, kayo na forever,” she said.

“Marami talagang unhappy marriages ngayon. So, I think it’s someone that you can grow old with. I know I’m not gonna grow old alone. Yes, I have my dogs. I have my kids. But I know I’m gonna be holding somebody’s hand when I’m old and gray. Whether it’s Herbert or whether it’s another man, I’m sure meron ‘yan.”