Choosy
It’s a common lament among my ?single girlfriends that there are no ?men to date. Much more so men ?who are confident enough to be with strong, career-driven, independent, and stylish women. Who are—I have to say—the women who make up most of my coop of single chickies. I would know. I was in the dating pool for too long. Going on so many blinds, set-ups and group dates, it wasn’t even funny. But then, like an inevitable theory (or maybe my mom’s answered prayers), fate stepped in, with a sense of humor, and now there’s nothing left to do but laugh and go along with it.
Thing is, the person I least expected to be with turned out to be the one person I was waiting for the whole time. And I’m lucky and fortunate because in the fashion circles, he’s the rare guy that gets fashionable women. Apart from being smart as a whip, witty and with a corny sense of humor, he’s open-minded to the point that he doesn’t even question why I love slouchy silhouettes and not clingy ones, or why I’m obsessing over the new Celine bag. He offers out his hand (and sometimes his whole arm) when I’m teetering in five-inch heels and just listens when I lament over the torturous height (“but it makes my legs look longer”) over one that’s saner and closer to ground level.
He gave me flowers, patterned out of the Lanvin-loves-H&M video, when I arrived from Hong Kong to shop for the collaboration. And got nervous when I decided to go blonde but says now that he likes me more with pale hair. He doesn’t have anything against cropped do’s and doesn’t insist that I keep my hair long—a lame prerequisite a lot of guys have. And he loves men’s fashion as much I love women’s—poring over Japanese street magazines and obsessing over brands as obscure as Devoa and Alexander Phlokov (Who?) to labels as big as Rick Owens, Lanvin and Undercover. He’s not a metrosexual—Lord forbid—but he uses product for his hair, is particular about how he dresses, is always neat, smells great, and has nice shoes.
Some would even think “that’s so gay,” but can’t a straight guy be conscious of how he looks without being labeled otherwise? That worries me, because how are straight guys supposed to be then? Uncouth, muddy with not a care in the world? I beg to differ, there are beautiful straight men, and they try to look as good as the most style-conscious lady. I just don’t know where the single ones are though because if I did, then they would have been dating my girlies already.
But back to me. It’s a match made in style heaven. Cue eyerolls, I know. But hey, I’m allowed to be publicly cheesy. It’s only once a year on Valentine’s! And to think I was such a big supporter of the “bah, humbug, love sucks” camp when I was single. But point is, (yes, there is a point) I really feel like I need to impart this one true thing—even at the risk of sounding like an annoying self-help book—I would just like to reiterate to all the single ladies: it’s not wrong to be choosy, or picky or to have high expectations. Regardless of what your mom, aunt, great aunt or the mom of your cousin on the far side of your dad (I know how reunions can get if you’re single) thinks. Knowing what you want and not settling for less makes the abstinence well worth it. Because for me, life is more fabulous when you’re with a man who gets it.
And no, I’m sorry, this is not about eligible bachelors that you can stalk either. I don’t have fairy godmother powers and I wish it was that easy. Instead, it’s a guy’s insight on being with someone who chooses not to blend in. I suppose it’s me wanting to show you that there are men who appreciate stylish women, and if you are like my fabulous single girlies, this might give you hope. As opposed to going the usual route, and interviewing fashion girls and how they’re with the right guy, I decided to go the other way around, and interview the guys who are with fashion girls. They are a rare breed indeed but certainly not an urban legend. The common denominator is that they approve of individuality, they think that confidence is sexy, and they are not afraid to explore their stylish sides as well. They are fabulous catches, and they would have been perfect really, except for the fact that all are happily committed to being in a relationship with style.
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Borgy Manotoc, sneaker store owner/model on girlfriend Georgina Wilson, VJ/celebrity
Style in the relationship.
“My style is dictated by the way I feel everyday. And the way I feel is heavily affected by my relationship. Mood is a big dictator of what fit and color I choose to wear. Good days mean more adventurous fit and colors, not so good means darker tones and usually more relaxed fits.”
First impressions last:
“Character and charisma define any outfit. I first noticed the ease that she carried herself with. High maintenance doesn’t have to be advertised.”
Describe your style, and hers, and how it works together.
“I think what always works is doing your own thing. Sometimes you end up wearing similar tones subconsciously but men and women use style differently.”
What is it about being with a fashion girl that you like the most?
“People have to have fun with clothes and their style. If she can’t get excited about dressing up then I won’t either.”
Being with a stylish girlfriend:
“I couldn’t have it any other way. Working in retail and fashion, style is a major priority so it is important that my partner understands that. And a lot of waiting.”
The big difference:
“Fashionable people use their style to make a statement about their personality. Some people see clothes as merely a necessity.”
What is it with her fashion sense that you love the most?
“She is open and knows her style is still a work in progress.”
And is there anything about women’s fashion that you don’t understand?
“I can relate with most things I just don’t understand foundation in the daytime. Women are beautiful, stop hiding behind your make up.”
Kiko Escora, artist, on girlfriend Marita Ganse, fashion designer/model
The wow factor.
“First time I met her, her attitude was different. She was open. And she was tall.”
Style in the relationship.
“Her style is always changing depending on the season and her moods. I’m not sure about my style, but I’m partial to black. i guess black works with most of what you throw it in with.”
Two words for having a girlfriend with style.
“It’s cool.”
It’s all in the spending habits.
“Not much difference between a girl who likes fashion from the one who doesn’t, except for the credit card bill.”
What is it with her fashion sense that you love the most?
“It’s fun, flexible and she doesn’t take her fashion too seriously.”
And is there anything about women’s fashion that you don’t understand?
“I think i understand women’s fashion more than some girls do (joke).”
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Mars Miranda, DJ, on girlfriend Pam Quinones, Stylist
Style in the relationship.
“I guess its something that’s there everyday... We talk about it when we talk about her work, and it’s something that we’re both interested in. It’s something that helps keep things interesting for us.”
Love at first height:
“Her shoes, and how high the heels were.”
The element of surprise:
“I like that I can never tell what she’ll be wearing when I see her... I get surprised every time I see what she’s wearing... So every time I see her, it feels like I get more and more attracted to her...”
What’s the best outfit that she’s ever worn?
“That’s so hard! Hahahaha”
And going back to the basics:
“I don’t think I could ever get tired of seeing her in her pajamas in the morning. =)”
Being with a stylish girlfriend...
“A fashion girl is someone you notice before she’s even near you, she’ll command attention when she’s there, your eyes follow her when she leaves and you’ll remember her after... Regular girls just walk by.”
And is there anything about womens fashion that you don’t understand?
“Not anymore.”
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Kiko Escora, artist, on girlfriend Marita Ganse, fashion designer/model
The wow factor.
“First time I met her, her attitude was different. She was open. And she was tall.”
Style in the relationship.
“Her style is always changing depending on the season and her moods. I’m not sure about my style, but I’m partial to black. i guess black works with most of what you throw it in with.”
Two words for having a girlfriend with style.
“It’s cool.”
It’s all in the spending habits.
“Not much difference between a girl who likes fashion from the one who doesn’t, except for the credit card bill.”
What is it with her fashion sense that you love the most?
“It’s fun, flexible and she doesn’t take her fashion too seriously.”
And is there anything about women’s fashion that you don’t understand?
“I think i understand women’s fashion more than some girls do (joke).”
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Martin Cuna, real estate broker,
on girlfriend Laureen Uy, fashion designer/blogger Style in the relationship.
“Well fashion is Laureen’s true love. Not a day goes by that she doesn’t research or do something fashion oriented. Basically it’s part of our everyday lives—together its sort of like a third wheel—in a subtle way.”
Not your plain jane.
“Honestly, when i first met her, I noticed her clothes. I couldn’t decide if I understood her fashion or not, but what I really noticed and liked was that it was different and she stood out.”
The convenience and perks of having a stylish girlfriend:
“What I like the most is that I have a personal stylist when I need one. Like when I have events where I have to be dressed nicely she can coach me on what to wear and what not to wear.”
What’s the best outfit that she’s ever worn?
“I can’t really recall a particular outfit because everyday is something different but I remember once we had dinner out, she was just wearing a plain white shirt a long plain dress with her hair tied. It was so not like her but she looked as beautiful as ever.”
What can you say is the difference between a fashion girl and a regular girl?
“Well, apart from the clothes they wear, it’s how they carry themselves. Fashion girls most of the time exude an air of confidence that makes them really stand out while a regular girl is more laid back and wouldn’t mind blending in with everybody else.”
What is it with her fashion sense that you love the most?
“I love how she can make clothes that no other girl can even think of wearing look great on her. I also love that she designs her own pieces and how she can transform a plain white shirt into something that’s different and definitely not typical.”
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Alfonso Hortaleza, businessman, on girlfriend Camille Co, fashion designer Style in the relationship.
“My outfits are always wearable, be it going to the office, to the mall or to a night out. I’m your everyday kind of guy, always for comfort and simplicity. Although I also experiment with fashion, I never go overboard. Just the right amount without getting all metro. Camille, on the other hand, always stands out. She really knows her fashion and never hesitates with it. She’s really unique and creative. I guess when we’re together, we complement each other because our styles never clash.”
University sweethearts.
“The first time I met Camille was during college. It’s a given that the first thing I noticed about her was her height since she’s modelesque compared to most girls. Of course, I also noticed her style. Even back in college, she was already different from the other girls who’d just wear simple shirts, jeans or dresses. She always had this unique touch that made her stand out among the rest. She really knows how to carry herself well.”
Fashion limitations?
“None at all. I want her to express herself in any way possible. I trust her fashion sense and her judgment.”
Pick a favorite look.
“I really don’t know. There’s not one look I can pinpoint because I like all of them. Whenever there’s a certain look that I think is my favorite on her, she comes out in another look the next day and it looks great on her too. She looks great in anything!”
Being with a stylish girlfriend:
“It’s great because my fashion sense always gets an upgrade. Before I met Camille, I used to always wear a shirt with khaki shorts and flip-flops. Now, I can say that I’ve added a lot of clothes to my repertoire. And people have been noticing, even my dad noticed the change. She also gives me tips on what works and what doesn’t. I used to get really confused with mixing and matching. Now though, I stick to her tips. It’s like I have a personal stylist with me all the time! Plus she pushes me to dress better.”
Loving a girl with style:
“A fashion girl is someone who knows how to mix different elements and make them look really good together. Everyone can wear a dress, but not everyone can wear it with some other layer, accessory and shoes and end up looking really damn good. A fashion girl looks good and she knows it.”
