For love or money?
LIVING ALIVE - LIVING ALIVE By Dero Pedero () - July 31, 2005 - 12:00am
Whenever I see a couple walking down the aisle, I always wonder, "Are they getting married for love or money?" We’ve heard of many instances where a good-looking lover boy marries an ordinary-looking (bordering on ugly) rich girl (or vice-versa) and they end up separating after an arduous, tumultuous settlement.

Every time I see an employee acting strangely at work, I invariably ask, "Is he working for love or money?" The ones working for love always show an obvious zeal at work, a glitter of joy in their eyes.

Once in a while, I can’t help but ask myself, "Am I loved for what I am or for my money?" (Not that I have oodles of moolah to toss around! The more appropriate question actually is: "Do they love me for me or my goodies?")

In this money-driven world, men are judged and valued for their money first. People always applaud a rich man even when he is out of tune. The ugly guy with the Jaguar gets the supermodel. Mr. Right, for more and more girls nowadays, is Mr. Rich. Who was it that said, "A man without a fat bank account generates no interest"?

The same is true with friends. People, like ants, congregate where the sugar is. Take away the sugar and they all disappear. You’ll get to know who your real friends are once you lose your money. And the quickest way to lose a friend is not to lend him money.

It must be tough to be really rich. You don’t know whether people are applauding your talent (if you have any) or your money. If you were Donald Trump, how sure can you be that your next trophy wife is truly in love with you? And your friends – are they for real or just money fiends?
Can’t Buy Me Love
"I don’t care too much for money; money can’t buy me love," sing the Beatles. With apologies to Lennon and McCartney, money can, of course, buy love. Maybe not true love, but love nonetheless that’s warm enough for the night.

Not everyone loves a rich man. Rich doesn’t necessarily make you lovable. People love rich, generous men. Not rich, stingy men. The bitter truth is that people always ask, "What’s in it for me?"

People love you for what you are if what they admire and adore in you is an internal attribute – attractiveness, intellect, talent, sense of humor, etc. But money is not an attribute. It is an external possession that can slip away, be stolen or lost.

There is really nothing wrong with desiring money, and for that matter doing things for money. It is falling in love with someone for his money that is repulsive. You might as well be his employee servicing his physical and sexual needs. Even to the modern mind, depending totally on someone and exchanging physical favors for financial security is revolting. It is always better to earn your own keep the conventional way.
Illusions And Reality
In life, the top motivators are love, money, sex, freedom (from want and fear, of speech, expression, and religion), and the exaltation of the ego. The tightly intertwined three are love, money and sex. Man gives love and money to get sex; woman gives sex to get love and money (or vice-versa).

I have a friend in his 50s who believes that he is loved for his good looks and body. He still can’t see what all his friends can – that he always sets himself up for doom and financial disaster with the pretty young things he cavorts with.

For a clearer grasp of your real life, it is healthy to ask once in a while, "Do I love this person for his love or his money?" "Am I doing this job for love or money?" Politicians should ask this of themselves and find out their real intentions for being in office.

Ask yourself these questions and be frank with your answers. It is good to junk our illusions, to face reality, know where you really stand, and dance to the music accordingly.
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