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Opinion

Reunions

ESSENCE - Ligaya Rabago-Visaya - The Freeman

The long summer break allows friends, former schoolmates, families, clans to reunite after a year or years of parting. For some, months or years of preparation have to be devoted just to make the event significant. The organizing team would make sure that the date would command a favorable attendance and so choosing it is so critical. Equally indispensable is the venue that provides meaningful holding of various activities, as well as the creation and reliving of memories. And for others, distance may be a factor but generally it becomes immaterial if the date has already been agreed upon. 

For a family reunion, much planning goes into it. Generally, someone sets the date and time, invites the guests, plans the menu and prepares for the activities. Making it successful is important as it brings family members together, offers opportunities for family members to connect with one another, and provides each person the opportunity to share memories and values that will last a lifetime.

There are many ideas that can make a family reunion special for everyone, regardless of age. One such idea is to encourage story-telling to help members get to know one another. This is especially enjoyable for children who may hear stories they have never heard before about family members. However, as suggested in Health Day, it is important to tell respectful stories that promote relationships. Obviously not all stories are appropriate, as some may hurt scars.

Family reunions are an important part of family life. They can help preserve fond memories, favorite recipes, stories and, most importantly, relationships that will last for generations. Given a chance, family reunions and celebrations can provide family members with important values, strong and lasting bonds, and a deep sense of belonging that they can pass on to their children and their grandchildren.

For others, college reunions can be looked at with equal parts of excitement and unease. There's the enjoyment of reuniting with friends who now live all over the globe, and the chance to relive some of the messy fun of college. But the formal reminder of time passed also presents an opportunity to evaluate life decisions over the past few years, which carries the risk of regret and insecurity from comparing yourself to others' formidable achievements.

Interesting studies conducted in the US provide a sense of relatedness to our local setting. Both Stanford University and Harvard University reported a similar pattern for their events. "Reunions shortly after college are particularly popular, followed by a dip around the 15-year reunion mark. During this time, graduates often seem to be under family or career stress and struggle to make the commitment. Then there's a significant uptick in attendance for the 25th-year reunion." Philip Lovejoy, executive director of the Harvard Alumni Association, says that the 25th reunion is "certainly the biggest" and marks a shift from previous reunions, during which alumni are more focused on their careers.

While our perspectives on what matters in life may change, friendships or the sense of belongingness stay intact, even after people go decades without seeing each other. When we actually come back, the experience is incredibly reassuring. People knew you then, and they know you now.

Whether it's a family/clan-initiated or academic-inspired reunion, it is already part of one's social undertaking in a community of people, a magnet driving friends and relatives to come wherever they are in the world, where recognition of one's memories, presence and contributions, be it big or small, are relived and valued.

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REUNIONS

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