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Freeman Cebu Business

Nothing is more important than relationship

LIFE'S ESSENCE - Katherine R. Oyson, Ph.D. - The Freeman

An unknown writer shared this story: “I sat next to bed of an old man, a friend for twenty years, and held his hand. Hal was dying. We both  knew that the next few days would be his last. We spent his time reminiscing about his long and fruitful career as a church pastor. We talked about old friends. We talked about his family. As I listened, he offered sage wisdom and advice to a member of a “ younger generation.”  At a lull in our conversation, Hal seemed to carefully consider what he was about to say next. Then, he squeezed my hand, gazed intently into my eyes and whispered, just loud enough for me to hear, “ Nothing is more important than relationship.... No project, no program, no task should be pursued at the expense of  friends and family. In the end, only your relationships will truly matter. Tend them well.”

The story reminds me of the homily of the priest who shared a story about a boy who asked his father how much he was earning per hour. When the boy learned how much he was earning, he told his father he wanted to borrow 100 dollars. The father denied the boy’s request. But before he went to bed, he went to his son’s room and asked him, why he would borrow money from him. The boy answered, “Daddy, I have only 100 dollars as my savings. With your 100 dollars that I would borrow,  I  could pay you of what you earned per hour so you can spend time with me.”

An unknown writer said,  “Quality time and communication are the basic ingredients of a harmonious relationship. A relationship would not blossom if we take our loved ones for granted. These two are the fertilizers in any seed of relationship.”

Speaking of relationships, Dr. Phil, a life coach,  points out some myths in a relationship with their corresponding truths. Here they are:

Myth#1. A great relationship is a peaceful one.

Truth: Don’t be afraid to argue because you think it’s a sign of weakness or relationship breakdown. Even the healthiest couples argue. If approached properly, arguing can actually help the relationship by releasing tension and  sense of peace knowing that you can release feeling without being abandoned or  humiliated. Instead of worrying about how many times you argue, worry about how you argue.

Myth# 2: A great relationship lets you vent all your feelings.

Truth: Getting things off your chest might feel good, but when you blurt something out in the heat of the moment, you risk damaging your relationship permanently. Many relationships are destroyed when one partner can’t forgive something that was said during the uncensored venting.

Myth#3. A great relationship has nothing to do with sex.

Truth: The belief that sex is not important is a dangerous and intimacy-eroding myth. Sex provides an important time out from the pressure of our daily lives and allows us to experience a quality level of closeness. Don’t restrict your thinking by considering sex to be  only in the physical act. Touching , caressing, holding hands and any means that which provide physical comfort can all be viewed as part of a fulfilling sex life. Most of all, don’t take your partner for granted.

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