'Akala ko patay na ako': Ana Jalandoni admits losing confidence after traumatic experience from Kit Thompson

MANILA, Philippines — Actress Ana Jalandoni recalled the physical assault she experienced from former boyfriend Kit Thompson last March 18 in a Tagaytay hotel.

In an interview on The Boy Abunda Talk YouTube channel uploaded in two parts last weekend, Jalandoni shared details of what happened the night before she was rescued by Tagaytay police.

Ana narrated that there was no particular huge fight between her and Kit before the incident, but she admitted that they were drunk and Kit grew paranoid thinking that she left him when she left their room trying to contact her female best friend and was just looking for a location with a better mobile network signal. Kit allegedly picked her up and threw her on the bed, and started hurting her until she passed out. 

When she regained consciousness, Ana remembered having a terrible headache and blurred vision, so she thought she was already dead.

"Akala ko patay na ako talaga kasi hinimatay ako eh, kasi wala ako makita talaga," she recalled. " Kinagat ko kamay ko para may maramdaman ako kasi akala ko talaga patay na ako kasi wala ako makita."

She eventually had the chance to go to the bathroom and send a selfie and ask for help from her video editor via Facebook messenger. The next day, she was able to ask for help from a woman who chanced upon their room, while Kit went down briefly to get a pain reliever. Later, the police was able to locate and rescue her.

When asked if she still loves Kit despite what happened, she said: "Mahal ko pa rin s’ya, Tito Boy."

But when asked if she is willing to forgive and reconcile with Kit, Ana stressed: “No, hindi ko alam kung magbabago sya."

She said that in time she will forgive him, but not return to him: “Hindi. Hindi ko deserve ‘yung ginawa n’ya sa’kin."

"Ayusin n’ya buhay n’ya," she said when asked for a message for her ex-boyfriend.

"Matuto s’ya sa mga pagkakamaling nagawa n’ya. Kailangan n’ya ng tulong, Tito Boy… Kahit masakit ‘yung ginawa n’ya sa’kin pero naiintindihan ko pa rin s’ya eh."

When asked how decided she is to press charges, she said: “Buo, Tito Boy. Kailangang pagbayaran n’ya ginawa n’ya sa’kin. Hindi makatao.”

Related: Ana Jalandoni to sue Kit Thompson for 'savage, barbaric acts'

Ana's legal counsel, Faye Singson, who was also at the interview, shared that when Ana approached them to file cases against her former beau, she said they found that she had injuries not only on her face.

"Pasa hindi lang sa mukha kundi sa buong katawan," Singson said.

Moreover, apart from physical pain, Singson said Kit also stepped on Ana's dignity, and Ana has to protect her "dangal bilang babae."

“Wala na akong confidence sa sarili ko, promise, Tito Boy, nawala," Ana said as a result of what happened.

"Napapangitan ako sa sarili ko. 'Pag titingin ako sa salamin, nakikita ko ‘yung nangyari. Parang nawala ‘yung Ana, ‘yung Ana na masayahin. Nawala ‘yung kasiglahan ko, nawala.”

According to Singson, although the Philippines scores highly in gender equality ratings, still, abuses happen.

"If there’s one thing hopefully good that comes out of this, (that is) she will be the face of women who stand up against violence. Sana ‘pag nakita ‘yung nangyari kay Ana, pasalamat na hindi nangyayari sa kanila, but you have to remember na may mga babae na dinanas din ang pinagdaanan n’ya at baka mas malala pa. Sana mas ma-encourage sila. They would be embolden to stand up against kasi ‘di dapat mangyari."

Ana said that she is hoping that by being open about her own experience, she can help other women and motivate them to fight for themselves.

"Kaya inilalaban ko eh para sa iba pa, para lumakas sila na ipaglaban sarili nila. Magsabi sila sa pamilya nila, sa pulis, kung kanino man," Ana said.

"Naniniwala po talaga ako Tito Boy na hindi lang ako ang nakaranas nito. Marami, takot lang talaga sila. Kaya nga po nilalaban ko di lang para sa akin, kundi para din sa kanila na lumakas ang loob nila na once may nanakit sa kanila, ipaglaban nila ang sarili nila." —With Deni Rose M. Afinidad-Bernardo, Video from The Boy Abunda Talk via YouTube

RELATED: Ana Jalandoni still loves Kit Thompson but will ‘fight for right as woman’