What calm people do


We are living in challenging times. We need to be calm to function well. Calmness does not come to people accidentally. Calm people embark on practices and disciplines that keep them calm. Here are some ideas you may find useful. They have a calming effect (pun intended).

Calm people infuse positive thought regularly

The wandering brain needs a little help by consciously filtering the barrage of information that seeks to occupy our mind space. Think positive thoughts, but this should be preceded by infusing more positive substance into it first.

Calm people disconnect

They get off the grid. They do not allow the newsfeeds to run after them. News and conspiracy theories are set to scare you out of your wits, disabling you from functioning well.

Calm people censor negative self-talk.

Negative thoughts that are not managed become “FACTS,” but they are not. They are just thoughts. You can manage this by writing the negative talk and thoughts on a piece of paper. Have someone with you look through it and evaluate the veracity of the items written. This slows down the negative momentum of your mental conversation and clears the way for you to be more rational and clear-headed. They do not ask the question: “What If?” It does not achieve anything positive and only fires up negative thoughts and imagination. It also robs you of utilizing time and energy to take positive actions that reduce your stress and worry.

Calm people have plenty of rest and sleep

Take a nap. It is ironic to have people stay home and yet not have enough rest and sleep in a work-from-home environment. There is no need to feel guilty of wanting to recharge when you need it.

I used to shuttle from one venue to another doing all those “in-person” speaking engagements pre-COVID. I got so tired. The Ilocana and I would go to a cinema to grab a few minutes of sleep, but then the movie would get so exciting I end up watching the whole thing, so I get more tired in the process. Today, I do training and webinars for clients all over the place. I enjoy the luxury of power naps and adequate sleep, which enables me to be fully alert and puts me at the prime of my condition to deliver excellent work.

Calm people exercise and eat healthy.

Somebody says: “Exercise in the morning before your brains figure out what you are doing.” I follow a ritual: COFFEE+TV+NEWS=Push ups and do body rituals. I monitor my weight every day, contrary to some speakers and authors saying I should not. The logic here is a business principle. You cannot manage what you do not measure. Eat right, eat healthy, and drink water. I have a four-liter Hydro Flask thingy that reminds me I need to consume water daily. I am a believer in vitamins and supplements, and I have been taking them for years.

Calm people have a support system.

A client invited me to give a webinar to 300 people, centered on the one theme: “Do not be afraid to ask for help when you need it.” The client understands that most people try to tackle everything by themselves, and when they cannot, they feel helpless and are overwhelmed. My message to the group is that asking for help is not a sign of weakness, but a sign of honesty and plain common sense during these difficult times. Bosses should find ways to provide support, assist, and empathize with their people’s plight. There is a term for this. It is called “good leadership practice.” Other support systems come in the form of a circle of friends or a bible study group. Asking for help will mitigate your stress and strengthen your relationships with those you rely upon.

Calm people pause, pray, and give thanks.

This practice may seem too easy or even a little silly, especially for those addicted to control. You know what I mean. These are the “I am the master of my fate and the captain of my soul” types whose favorite song is “I Did It My Way.” No wonder they are hyper-stressed because this pandemic situation is beyond their control. Pause. Breathe. Pray. And give thanks. Be mindful of the present and appreciate the blessings you have even in the midst of difficult circumstances. The Scriptures say: “In ALL things give thanks.” And that is what I constantly do.

Somebody says: “Never in the history of calming down has anyone calmed down by being told to “Calm Down!”” Perhaps these practices would be more effective.



(Francis Kong’s highly acclaimed Level Up Leadership Master Class Online runs from Oct. 13 to 15. For inquiries and reservations, contact April at +63928-559-1798 or for more information, visit www.levelupleadership.ph)

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