Between confidence and delusion

“Francis, can I have a few minutes of your time? I would like to know if you are willing to invest in my new project. Can we have coffee, and would you allow me to you present you the project I am working on?” says this young entrepreneur wannabe. Perhaps a term for this person is a “wannapreneur.”

I have known him for years. He is a good person and throughout his life, he has continuously come up with business ideas. Some of which are bizarre, some not very original. On any given day, he is the type of person who likes to namedrop people. At one time, he wanted me to enter an exclusive deal for a tech product he was introducing, he showed me the figures and the projected revenues. They were amazing! If I had said yes to the proposal, then in a matter of months I would have been making a fortune. The millions and millions I would have made would have been more than enough wealth to feed my children and my children’s children too.

He spoke with a lot of enthusiasm, he was confident and articulate; this “wannapreneur” was always rolling, hustling, and was still 100 percent sure his new business venture would work. I only have one problem with this person. None of his projects worked. He was always over-promising, but he never delivered.

Today, this “wannapreneur” avoided me. He knows that I know, but he is still hustling, namedropping, exuding confidence seeking the next person who would be captive to his latest business venture, searching for innocent, wide-eyed, naive investors who would want to get rich quick.

Here is the key. I have seen a whole generation of young and not-so-young “wannapreneurs” everywhere. They exude a massive amount of confidence, but are delusional. They read motivational books; many of them have somehow maneuvered people and situations to have themselves invited to give “motivational success speeches.” University students invite them to speak. They mesmerize the young souls into believing that they have made a fortune and that they are set out to make more. They have beautiful websites; they write blogs and make all kinds of claims. Of course, they should. How else would they be able to generate interest and prospects?

Here is a funny observation. I used to say that authentic business consultants and practitioners have lousy, ugly, and uninteresting web sites, while the fakes, scammers, and the pretenders have beautiful web sites with fantastic claims. And some unsuspecting HR people google-search them; invite the wannabe’s and “wannapreneurs” to speak to their people, only much to their dismay later. The question here is, why are these “wannapreneurs” so confident with their delusion?

You need to blame the trend and the rage of the ‘60s on positive thinking and self-esteem. Self-help books began to sell like crazy. Developing high self-esteem and having positive self-thoughts and feeling good about the self was the prevalent theme and trend in psychology because they banked on research that indicates people who feel good about themselves are confident to perform better.

The self-esteem practices and movement sold very well as parents, politicians, teachers bought it and “motivational speakers” taught it. The movement meant well. It was a way to convince low-achieving kids to develop confidence and overcome their shyness or lack of achievement. Even pastors and ministers, especially the televangelists (aptly named as the pro-wrestlers of Christianity) began preaching that God created us to be successful. The spread of the prosperity gospel permeated through the airwaves as in many churches. It’s all about positive thinking as pastors and ministers started speaking like motivational speakers, convincing their congregation that each person is unique, special, and is destined for greatness.

And here come the wannabe speakers telling their to students about how they became millionaires at the young age of 19 and that the key to success is to:

“Believe in yourself,” “Follow your dreams,” and “Fight for your rights.” Many speakers and celebrities still say the same things today, but it is the antithetical teaching of Scriptures wherein Jesus said, “Deny yourself, pick up the cross and follow me...”

Well, over the years and generations later, what is evident is that feeling good about yourself does not make you successful. All those positive thinking with our unrealistic assessment of the situation will not make a person rich and wealthy. And the once-young, highly impressionable fresh graduates today have entered the workplace and find themselves still so far from the dreams that they were promised and have developed a uniquely 21st century malaise called quarter life crisis.

Get real! Optimism must be tempered with realism because, without it, this sense of confidence becomes delusional. Yes, confidence is required, but there can be no confidence without competence and an incessant drive for learning executed through old fashion grind and hard work. That is what leads to success. Because behind success is the process which takes time, a lot of knowledge, and activities to get things right before you can enjoy the fruit of the effort.

The frequently quoted Vince Lombardi’s comment on success still rings true today as he has said: “The only place success comes before work is in the dictionary.” This is so true, and I can say this with full confidence. And you can be assured it is reality and not a delusion at all.

(Attend the two exciting and inspiring days of leadership training with Francis Kong in his highly acclaimed Level Up Leadership seminar-workshop on May 21 and 22 at Seda Vertis North, Quezon City. For registration or inquiries contact April at +63928-559-1798 or register online at www.levelupleadership.ph)