That papal hand-slapping incident
Pope Francis has publicly apologized for "losing his patience" and "setting a bad example" following an incident on New Year's Eve in which he slapped the hand of a woman who pulled him toward her as he made his way through pilgrims and walked away visibly upset. By now most everyone must have already seen the video of the incident and formed their own conclusions. Here is mine.
I do not think it was patience that Pope Francis lost. Nobody loses patience over one incident, especially when prior to that everything had been free from stress. And as the video in question suggests, the pope was happily moving through the crowd of pilgrims before a woman took his hand and tugged, upsetting his balance.
No, Pope Francis did not lose his patience. He lost his equilibrium. He did not know how to react to the unforeseen incident. Surprising though it may be, his decades of public life did not seem to prepare him for an appropriate reaction to an inappropriate action. If it is any consolation, the pope did not set a bad example either. He reacted the way any human would in such a situation, and that is reflexibly.
Reflex is unconscious motion, often out of a need for self-preservation. Frail as he is at 83, I am sure reflex action would allow him to throw down any man who suddenly jumps on his back. And if the pope walked away from the woman and the crowds visibly upset, it was not because he was angry, or frustrated, which was the word used in some reports. He just did not recover easily from the surprise.
If there is a lesson to be learned from the incident, both by ordinary mortals like us and by the pope, in fact more so by the pope than by us ordinary mortals, it is that one must always be prepared for anything in a public setting. And then know how to react appropriately. Getting caught by surprise can spring unpleasant surprises. Just ask Philippine Supreme Court administrator Midas Marquez.
It was good of Pope Francis to apologize even if, reflex action being unintentional, he never had any intention to slight the woman, much less to do her any harm. An apology is both a sign of humility and of dignity, qualities that must always be present in a pope, who is the father of the Holy Roman Catholic Church, and therefore of nearly two billion people on earth.
As the supreme authority of his church, the pope must outwardly project that firmness of authority. But he must not lose that humility and dignity inside. Because it is the presence of all three that makes him effective in who he is as a father. To be a father is tough, especially if you have to have all three qualities. Fathers are difficult to understand. Sometimes you have to become one to see through one.
I have found an easy, if heartrending, way to understand fathers and the emotions and conflicts that often go on inside them. Look for a recording or video of Bruce Springsteen's "The River." Pick the live version recorded at LA Coliseum. It is of two parts, the first a narrative about his frequent run-ins with his father, the second the song itself. The song is great but listen to the narrative. Hope it makes you understand your father better.
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