Dina Bonnevie talks about motherhood, life, death and love
Last weekend marked a double celebration for Dina Bonnevie and her children, Danica and Oyo Boy Sotto, as they celebrated both Mother’s Day and Danica’s birthday.
In an intimate interview with the press, the veteran actress shared the pain and joys of motherhood and described the kind of mother she is. “It’s hard to be a mom kapag pasaway ang bata, but it’s easy to be a mom when your children love you and they feel it (mother’s love).”
She’s the type of mom who offers marital advice to her children with former partner Vic Sotto only when they ask for it. “I’ll wait for my son or my daughter to ask for advice before I even open my mouth. Here (during the interview), no-holds-barred ako, but when it comes to my children, hindi ako basta nakikialam. I’ll wait for them to ask for my opinion… I’m careful.”
Being a mother in real life, Dina could easily relate to her role in the Prime Original series “Love Is Never Gone,” where she plays the mother of Fyang Smith’s Raya. The series also marked Dina’s return to ABS-CBN after “The Blood Sisters” in 2018.
According to Dina, she was supposed to reunite with fellow veteran actresses Snooky Serna and Maricel Soriano for a project, but it didn’t push through. If ever they do a reunion project, she said it would likely center on the theme of motherhood.
“Iba-iba klase ng ina, adulting mother na walang pakialam, puro career. Siguro isang mother na puro Bible class na akala niya mabuti siyang ina pero ubos na pala, something na ganun siguro or iba-ibang klaseng asawa — asawang mukhang pera, mapagmahal, puro trabaho.”
A challenging year
Last year was a very challenging one for the actress following the passing of her husband, Deogracias Victor “DV” Savellano, a Department of Agriculture undersecretary and former Ilocos Sur governor, due to an abdominal aneurysm.
“Last year was heavy for me, but I’m better now than I was last year. If I were to describe the lowest point of my life, that was last year,” she reflected.
She couldn’t help but still feel emotional about it but reminded herself to be “strong enough not only for myself but also for my kids.”
“They (children) don’t want to see me cry. They told me, ‘Let’s move on. Tapos na yan. Let’s do something positive.’ That’s why the ‘House of D’ (a talk show with Danica and Oyo) came to be. Danica and Oyo said, ‘Ma, you’ve been crying for six months. Tama na kasi ang laki na ng pinayat mo.’ I lost a lot of weight because I was depressed. I kept asking, ‘Why, why, why?’ Parang ang tagal kong walang asawa, tapos nagkaroon ako ng asawa tapos kinuha naman pala. Parang hindi mo maiintindihan yung reason.”
When asked if she had already found the answers to her “whys,” she said, “I think maybe it was really his time.”
“At first, I couldn’t understand it. But when I read the Bible, it is written there that even before you were born, there’s already a date on when you’re going to die and how you’re going to die,” she continued, adding that she also consulted various pastors.
“But only God knows. So, you cannot question His wisdom kung bakit. And then yun nga sinabi sa akin ng pastor, maybe God wants to use you in another way. ‘How?’ Tapos naging guest ko si Ai-Ai (delas Alas) and she said lagi daw siyang nawawalan ng asawa.”
“So, I asked, why does God want me to be single? What should I do na dapat single ako? Because if you’re going to teach about God, you can do it even if you’re married. Kaya sabi ko, ‘What it is that He wants me to do that I have to be single?’”
“But it’s true that when somebody close to you dies, you feel like half of you has died. Parang it took time for me to find myself again because we’re very close and we did a lot of things together,” she mused about her late husband.
“Life is so short. You’ll never know when you’re gonna go,” she said in tears.
‘Clinically dead’
Dina believes in life after death after she was reportedly clinically dead for one minute and 10 seconds in 1989 due to severe asthma. Although the incident happened decades ago, she can still remember it vividly.
She was rushed to the hospital after experiencing difficulty breathing during one of her tapings due to smoke coming from a smoke machine. “I couldn’t see anything and it was just my ears that I could hear my sister. Sabi ko, ‘What’s going on?’ (My sister said), ‘Halika ka na. Let’s go. You have to go to the hospital,’” she recalled.
“I could hear the doctor (say), ‘The patient is rejecting it, four liters of oxygen, monitor, no response. Six liters, no response. Just put it, goddamn it.’ And then everything went silent. Sabi ko, OK na pala ako tumahimik na lahat. So, I got out of bed and approached my sister. Pag ganun ko, tumagos yung kamay ko sa body niya. I was surprised. When I looked at the bed, my body was there. ‘Where am I?’”
“And then I saw this cord from my navel to where I was, there was a silver cord na nakadugtong. ‘What is this? Where am I? Why you couldn’t hear me?’ And then I entered a very, very long tunnel. Alam mo yung roller coaster na sa sobrang bilis na gumaganun yung balat mo sa sobrang lakas ng hangin,” added she. “Tapos paglabas ko biglang quiet na quiet na parang may heavenly voices na it sounded like a scream and yung sound ng hangin na wooooshhh tapos biglang may nag-appear na very, very bright light na papunta sa akin.”
“And then out of nowhere, I cried, and parang the light just enveloped me. Sobrang sarap ng feeling. ‘Ayoko ng umalis dito.’ Parang this is love, 1,000 percent more than a mother’s love, more than a daughter’s love. I felt so loved by that light. And then lumayo siya sa akin and then may screen sa harapan ko.”
A series of flashbacks from her life appeared on the screen — when she was in Switzerland with her mother, when her classmate died and when she and Vic Sotto separated.
As she recounted, “I was 18 when I went to Switzerland with my mom. She told me, ‘You’re Swiss, you’re supposed to be independent, you’re 18, you’re on your own…’ Sabi ko, ‘Ma, it’s my first time I don’t know where (to go).’ She left me… We went all over Europe. Sabi niya, ‘You have to know your country, and you also have to know the countries all around Europe.’ When I found my way back, I found a guy who could speak English, nainis ako sa kanya. Nagkasagutan kami.”
Another flashback occurred when Dina’s classmate died in an accident while they were kids. “Dala-dala niya yung bote tapos nadapa siya, pumasok yung bote sa tiyan niya, she died. But it was not my fault… Kaso kasi kinain niya yung baon ko. Sabi ko, ‘Why did you eat my baon?’ Baon yung Sunkist na ganun, yung triangle.”
“(My classmate) said, ‘Geraldyn (Dina’s real name), I’ll buy you na lang merienda.’ She bought one and she was running… Ganun pala siya namatay, I didn’t know. Tapos sabi ko, ‘Lord, hindi ko naman alam.’ I was just a kid at that time.”
The last memory from her past was the moment when she and Vic called it quits. “‘Lord, alam mo bakit kami naghiwalay…’ nag-re-reason ako. ‘God, it’s not my fault.’ Until sa natapos na yung ganun and then parang telepathic na kinakausap ako na, ‘Do you want to come with me? Yeah, yeah, yeah, I’m going to come with you. Just give me five minutes. I just need to talk to my daughter. I need to tell her something.’”
When Dina looked at the end of the tunnel, she saw Danica, who shouted, “Mama!” “Paghawak ko sa kamay niya, I woke up at the hospital, dini-defibrillator ako, shino-shock wave. ‘What happened?’ I asked. My sister told me, ‘Where did you go? Ba’t ang tagal mong ma-resuscitate?’”
It was a life-changing and extraordinary experience for Dina. Years later, still searching for answers, Dina reached out to author and parapsychologist Jaime Licauco, who told her, “There’s a reason why you were sent back.”
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