Why husbands and wives sometimes eat the forbidden fruit?
An auntie of mine who lives in California gave me a book some ten summers ago, a non-fiction, entitled "Why Men And Women Can Not Be Faithful All The Time?" It was quite a well-written psychological and philosophical analysis on why and how marriages are broken and families shattered due to the philandering of husbands, and, to be fair about it, also partly, by the adulterous entanglements of some wives. By the way, that aunt's marriage was ruined by the unfaithfulness of my uncle. She left my uncle with the kids and got herself employed as an OFW in the US to help support five growing kids. My uncle and aunt were so in love with each other. But sex and romance could not be had by remote control.
When I asked my uncle why did he decide to annul their marriage, the answer was pure and simple." Your auntie left me and went abroad to work. I just needed companionship, at first. But, later, I learned to love my partner more than I value my wife." This is the first and most notorious culprit: physical separation deteriorating into alienation of affection. Labor migration, to my mind, is the number one wrecker of marriages and families. In my nine-year stint as Labor Attache to three countries, I witnessed how good and decent OFWs become involved in extra-marital affairs with each others - men being involved with other women or even with other men.
Without making reference to any single incident of alleged infidelity, and with malice towards no one, my researches indicate that most acts of unfaithfulness take place between the ages of 31 and 45 for men, and between 30 and 43 in the case of women. Marriages in the urban centers among professionals usually occur at ages 24 to 30. Infidelity normally takes place after five to seven years of marriage. They call it the seven-year itch or something. Most incidents of concubinage or husband's infidelity involve marine officers and crew and engineers, especially those assigned away from home, like an oversea employment. The next more guilty are accountants and businessmen, bankers and salesmen.
The professionals who are least inclined to philandering are doctors and lawyers. The works of doctors and lawyers are too burdensome and taxing that their libido are often diminished by sheer physical exhaustion and mental fatigue. They become involved in affairs only when their wives do not give them enough sexual fulfillment, or are not creative enough to avail of unconventional romances and sexual experimentations, to the extent that unsatisfied husbands are compelled to go outsourcing. Also, lawyers are very careful about affairs because of the exacting demands of the Canons of Professional Responsibility. It is very risky to eat the forbidden fruit outside the garden of Eden. Like God, the Supreme Court is closely watching.
We have heard of many lawyers being suspected of unfaithfulness. Believe me, more than two-thirds of those suspicions are pure rumors, without a shred of truth. Lawyers are among the most faithful husbands that women can ever have. If ever a lawyer falls once or twice, it could only be some summer fling called "touch and go", or "hit and run." Lawyers always love their families. If one ever stumble, be a simple act of self-defense. When there is an irresistible force of attraction, and the lawyer did not commit any sufficient provocation, the wife should give him clemency, mercy and compassion. He may have acted with passion and obfuscation. Forgiveness is the best evidence of love. By the way, my auntie forgave my uncle. They reconciled as friends, although the love never came back.
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