A smorgasbord of Willie Nep's 'alter-egos'

I know the real Willie Nepomuceno, or Willie Nep for effect, and he’s not any of the myriad characters, his stage “alter-egos,” that we all love to see him in.

For me, the real Willie Nep is the one with an earphone, seated behind a microphone at a booth at the ABS-CBN Studio co-hosting Music & Memories, my favorite Sunday afternoon (3 to 5 p.m. on dzMM) pastime, with Boots Anson-Roa. They make a perfect match, one a foil to the other.

But on May 26, Saturday, 8:30 p.m. at the Music Museum, I will see Willie Nep as former Justice Serafin Cuevas who has caught the fancy of the public at the Impeachment Trial not only with his legal brilliance and bravado (thanks to stem cell?) but also with his unique hairdo. He’s the newest addition to Willie Nep’s growing roster of “alter-egos.”

For good measure, Willie Nep will bring back his (Senate President) Johnny Ponce-Enrile “alter-ego” after first portraying him in 1986 after the People Power Revolt.

The show is titled, you guessed it, Willie Nep On Trial & Error. Watch it and see how it’s really more fun(ny) in the Philippines.

Meanwhile, Funfare asked Willie Nep to make a list of, first, his 10 Favorite “Alter-Egos” and then the 10 People He’d Rather Not Impersonate.

His 10 Favorite “Alter-Egos”:

1. ERAP — Because he’s got a very charming personality that tickles the audience’s fantasy and that electricity is sustained throughout my act even if the joke is on him. His self-deprecating humor is what makes him laughable and lovable through the many years I’ve been doing impressions of him from the time he was a mayor, senator, vice president, president and perhaps mayor again?   

2. DOLPHY — In like manner, he is always a crowd favorite. And because he’s so well-loved, it’s always inspiring to perform him in all my shows. He has served as an inspiration in my career that I savor being him even for a fleeting moment as a Comedy King.

3. MARCOS — He was my first big impression act. I’ve done him in every place where there’s a protest rally of activists in UP or Plaza Miranda. My Marcos act need not be scripted. As Marcos, I can answer any question, intelligent or otherwise, even when I just got up from bed. I felt I knew him through and through and with great passion because I was doing it for a cause. Marcos was an infamous personality worldwide that I got good reviews from a Japanese newspaper and television show, Asiaweek, and The Washington Times during and after Martial Law.

4. CARDINAL SIN — Being a man of the Church, his stereotype holy character is always a good source of funny lines for role reversals. The public’s perception of him as a gentle shepherd can produce a number of witty lines like “Welcome to the house of Sin” or “I condemn gambling because it will make the poor even poorer. You don’t believe me? Sige, pustahan tayo.” He is the epitome of the classic opposite characterization. Like I can make him sing rock or rap music and that’s already funny.

5. GRINGO HONASAN — Because I fooled a lot of people face to face disguised as “the Mutinee Idol” with the black long locks and bemustached Colonel. Then, as the “Fugitive Senator” with the salt-and-pepper hairdo minus the snake on his shoulders.  The first time the “rebel coup plotter” showed up at a Manila Hotel press forum, he scared the wits out of some politician guests at the convention hall and surprised the local and foreign media. I landed at the front pages of most dailies and an article in a foreign magazine. The next time was at the same venue where squads of military and police officers surrounded the hotel hoping to capture me…when I was only promoting a show at the Music Museum. What great publicity I got, and an SRO.

6. P-NOY — Obviously because he’s the toast of the town. He’s the new President. Popular, controversial and uninitiated. I’d like him to succeed anyway. We can’t go on living our own separate ways forever.

7. FVR — It took a longer time for me to make an analysis of his true character. He was touted as a psy-war expert and a pikon. Eventually though I opted to do him anyway. If I survived the Marcos years, why can’t I hurdle a gentler relative. And by that time some quarters have considered me as a social commentator of sort, so it’s a role in society that I have to play, and not just as an actor. I was nervous in our first encounter but when I approached him for a handshake, he whispered to me, “Give me a high five.” The next morning, all news dailies carried our front-page photo op. What a gimmicky yet amiable guy.

8. SAMMY DAVIS JR. — He has always been my idol since I met him in Raon. Yes, Raon in Quiapo where I buy thrown-away records from the US at a bargain. For me, he is the complete entertainer. Dancer, singer, actor, musician, comedian and, most of all, a fine impressionist and a wonderful person. Ask Pilita Corrales. I watched all three of his shows in Manila for a price but no regrets. I even got him to autograph one of his earlier albums simply titled Impressions. However, I lost it to the Big Flood called Ondoy.

9. FRANK SINATRA — I like the sound of the big band and I like the way he crooned. And somehow I’d like to experience the way they were in those good old days when things were simpler but real talent was revered. I still dream to sing with a big band.

10. FPJ — He’s a real icon. I was just beginning to know him better when he left us. Whenever I do take-offs on him, I can feel how well-loved he is. Much as I want to do him, I think it will be irreverent of his memory. He could have been one of my big acts. Gone too soon.

And The 10 people He’d Rather Not Impersonate:

1. FEMALES. I’ve done vocal impressions of Sylvia La Torre when I was a kid, Julie Andrews when I was in high school, Armida Siguion-Reyna when I was in college and Cory Aquino when she became President. As a young boy, I was doing impressions of animals, musical instruments, sound effects and cartoon voices including American singers. In fact, I’ve done a number of women characters for a TV special long before Dustin Hoffman came up with Tootsie. Likewise, I did a full prosthetic impression of former First Lady Ming Ramos in a TV commercial and a live performance as Haydee Yorac. However, I decided to strike them out altogether for one reason — I feel uneasy doing them. It felt like I was insulting the female species by making my voice squeaky, my actions ladylike, etc., which a man could never approximate anyway. I’d rather paint the female form than make it look ridiculous.

2. JDV. Whichever way you look at him, popular or unpopular, doing an impression of him will be construed as a ridicule instead of a satire. His portrayal would turn out to be a caricature of sort and will only result in making him as a laughing stock. My object in doing an impression is to ventilate issues at hand, not to make fun of personalities.

3. JOE MARI CHAN. He’s always a big hit every time I do him. One time though I thought I read his mind differently from what he’s trying to display. He was all smiles, applauding and cheering for me. I went straight to the point and asked him anyway. Admittedly, he was slighted when I put on my prop ears. I had no intentions of exaggerating them, just a signature characterization and tribute to him as a pillar of the industry but I got the point. Perhaps the better way to give my respect to him was to axe the act altogether because deep in my heart (pun intended) I still salute him for his everlasting contribution to the Philippine music industry.

4. FG. He’s a big man. Powerful. Easy to do. But why bother? He’s not worth it.

5. APRIL BOY. Anyone and everyone can do him so what’s the point? Di ko kayang tanggapin.

6. BROTHER MIKE. He’s still popular but he’s so over-exposed there’s no more novelty in his character.

7. CJ CORONA. Of course, I can do him. He’s so well-known now. Kaya lang wala siyang dating. Sayang ang make-up at costume ko.

8. PIOLO PASCUAL. How I wish I could look like him. I can only do an impression of his abs. Pero di ko kaya manggaya ng guwapo.

9. BB GANDANGHARI. No comment. I just won’t.

10. ARNOLD CLAVIO. Hands up. Mas magaling manggaya si Arn Arn kay Arnold kaysa sa akin.

(Note: For tickets to Willie Nep On Trial & Error, call TicketWorld at 891-9999 or Music Museum at 721-0635.)

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