Bikini eye-opener

With the preponderance of ‘formula’ on both our movie and TV screens, you become extra grateful for instances when a studio dares to buck the trend, and pray that this kind of ‘courage’ can still be blessed with commercial success. If our movie screens have witnessed a glut of teenage-inspired romance and love teams; television programming has become fantasy teleserye-land and half-baked reality concepts. It may be coming from where we least expect it, but Robbie Tan’s Seiko Films and director Jeffrey Jeturian have come up with the perfect antidote to cinematic same-ness and blandness. The film is called Bikini Open; and it’s a satirical comedy, filmed as a mock-documentary/current affairs TV show, replete with a savage and biting script (kudos to Chris Martinez and his screenplay) that righteously skewers our very Philippine obssession with beauty contests and co-gender swimsuit competitions. Satire has never been so much fun... and revealing.

One is almost tempted to say this is a cinematic equivalent of a roman a clef or is in fact, an expose of the thriving industry that lurks behind all the swimsuit competitions we consistently lap up with gusto. One wonders how much of the script is pure invention, and how much is lifted from real anecdotes and incidents. Like some Dante’s Inferno, each level of the ‘Circles of Hell’ is represented - the designers, the make up artists, the beauty experts and fashion photographers, the contest organizers, judges, and sponsors, the stage directors, the talent scouts, the stage mothers, and of course, the contestants themselves. And let’s not forget the ready audience of DOM’s, matronas and gays; and the at times abusive media that cover these events. Each are both victim and victimizer, all playing their dual roles in the vicious circle/subculture that swirls behind the scenes of these contests.

The premise is simple enough, Cherry Pie Picache (who spectacularly holds the film together as our guide to this subculture) is the anchor of a telemagazine show whose ratings are slipping, and her producer tells her she has to spike the ratings with more exciting subjects - less hard news and more sensationalist fare. She targets an ongoing Bikini King and Queen contest and the fun commences.

Proving there is true comedic talent abounding beyond their stints on televison sitcoms and gag shows, we have Francine Prieto and Diana Zubiri. Francine takes her oft-repeated deadpan one line of ‘Why?...Because I can" all over the place with resulting hilarity; while Diana plays a ‘pa-demure’ but ambitious contestant. Alfred Vargas, JE Sison, Nina Ricci Alagao, Rafael Rosell, they all shine in this ensemble cast. There are great cameos by Ricky Davao, Michael de Mesa, Marissa Delgado, Rodel Velayo and Tim Yap. Set and costume whiz Joey Luna moves front of camera as a talent manager who parodies all managers. More than the mere walk-on’s we see in Amercan films, these cameos help propel and develop the amusing plot twists that abound in this film.

The editing and cross-cutting devices that Jeffrey utilizes are truly functional, and not mere effect - witness the exposition of the contest’s qualifications and howl with glee. He plays and teases with different camera angles and split screens. He maintains the fiction of our viewing the TV show while the whole film progresses, and you just have to watch the ending – a spoof of a notorious FHM shoot I still remember. Cherry Pie’s character evolves into a media personality nightmare (Hmm, based on anyone we know?); and to see her get the ultimate comeuppance is worth the price of admission alone. The Q & A section of the contest is also a great send-up of how seriously silly we’ve all become with these contests.

The bikini may be a two-piece phenomenon, but in the assured hands of director Jeturian, it’s a unified one piece that titillates and satisfies with true aplomb. Go watch this film, you’ll either be laughing off your seats, or be satisfactorily amused. Either way, it’s a telling sociological snapshot of the Filipino psyche. The film never fails to entertain, as it strips off and reveals the sordid mess behind the poise and ‘perfection’ we associate with events of this kind. Even Kenny Rogers would have been proud, as there’s a rightful ‘roasting’ going on. The hoped for box-office success would indeed be encouraging, as other film-makers and studios would see that with the right entertaining script one does not have to stick to clichés and ‘formula’. Intelligence and wit can work on various levels and do not necessarily spell box-office doom.