Living happily ever after

Welcome to the little paradise of Mr. and Mrs. Dingdong Avanzado (nee Jessa Zaragoza): A three-bedroom (excluding the attic which has been converted into a maids’ quarters and laundry-drying area) townhouse, perched on a 260-square-meter lot at the Golf Hills Terraces in Old Balara, Quezon City. The townhouse, worth P7 million (plus more than P1 million in renovation expenses), is part of a 56-unit cluster where Dingdong and Jessa count among their well-heeled neighbors the likes of Jessica Soho and the daughter of Sen. Johnny Flavier.

"It’s quiet here," said Jessa.

"We planned to move to a condo unit in Eastwood City (Quezon City)," said Dingdong. "But when we checked this place out, we fell in love with it at first sight."

Still deep into their honeymoon stage, having been married for only nine months (last March 18), Dingdong and Jessa were the picture of a couple very much in love, holding hands most of the time and, yes, living happily ever after. They used to live in the ancestral home of Dingdong’s paternal grandmother in Blue Ridge, Quezon City. (Jessa’s own condo unit in Ortigas Center is now occupied by her mom, sisters and a brother.)

"Come," the couple invited ace photographer Richard Chen and me. "Let’s look around."

The mini "tour" started at the ground floor where the dining room is (table seating six), a cozy kitchen with a bar (at the corner is a ref given as wedding gift by the couple’s ninong, Danding Cojuangco), a lanai converted into a theater room (highlighted by a wide-screen TV set; below, left), a small sala and part of the former lanai converted into a little garden (with a coffee table for two, photo at bottom right).

"Every inch counts," said Dingdong. "That’s why our furniture pieces are sukat na sukat, exact to the last inch."

The place was made to look bigger and wider with mirrors installed wall-to-ceiling on almost all the walls. The sala didn’t look crowded at all and a Christmas Tree at one side didn’t hamper the movement of the people around.

"Let’s go upstairs," said Jessa.

At the second-floor landing stands an aparador full of Jessa’s collection of angels (see photo above). To the left is the guest room with a bed covered with a checkered sheet. This room will be turned into a baby’s room, if and when, shielded from the sun by light-colored blinds. The other rooms served as part-music room and part-recreation room, with a sofa bed and a stereo sound system. Dingdong had the original wooded window torn down and replaced it with a sliding glass door, opening to a refreshing view of green fields where cows were grazing (at the time we were there).

"You can see birds in the trees," said Dingdong, "and all kinds of insects. In the morning, we listen to the birds sing; some of them even fly inside because the window is open. We don’t need an aircon here."

Quiet and unpolluted and full of fresh air, as Jessa was saying.

The couple’s bedroom seemed too small for the king-size bed, across which is another giant TV set. On both side tables, stood bottled water. "We can’t go to bed without first drinking water," volunteered Jessa. "Habit na namin ’yon."

You slide a mirror-covered door and you are one step into the wardrobe area, with rows and rows of all sorts of clothes, both Dingdong’s and Jessa’s, and at the far corner is the couple’s bathroom which Dingdong (especially) is very proud of. "You can stay inside and just read," boasted Dingdong. "It’s cozy, a small hideaway in itself."

Back at the sala, we sat with Dingdong and talked about their marriage and how they’re living happily ever after.

Your wedding was very controversial, surrounded by all sorts of unsavory rumors, such as the one about Jessa shouldering almost all the expenses.

Dingdong: People who spread those rumors obviously don’t know my family. (Dingdong belongs to the prominent and well-to-do Veloso Clan of Samar. His grandfather, Fernando "Nanding" Veloso, was once Governor of the province where I also come from. – RFL)

Jessa: Bago pinasok ni Dingdong ang bagay na ’to, reding-ready na siya – emotionally, financially, physically. Handang-handa na siya. We don’t really have to elaborate on those things; between the two of us na lang ang mga ’yon. It’s none of other people’s business to meddle in our expenses. Why, do we ask or borrow money from them?

What’s the age gap between you ba?

Dingdong: Eleven years. I’m 33, Jessa is 22.

Jessa: He doesn’t look like his age, di ba? Baby-faced kasi, e.

Doesn’t the age gap get in the way of your relationship? Sino ang mas nagdadala ng relationship n’yo?

Jessa: It’s me!

Dingdong: I was telling Jessa, "You know, if we were of the same age, we might not have ended up as husband and wife." If I was as old as Jessa is, baka away lang kami nang away. Let’s admit it, Jessa is immature in some ways and I understand her because I’ve passed through that (immature) stage already. ’Yung pinagdadaanan niya ay nadaanan ko na, so I can guide her along the way.

How many girlfriends did you have before you settled down with Jessa?

Jessa: Hayan! Tingnan ko kung ilan...

Dingdong (Somewhat hesitant): Short relationships? A few. Serious ones... I guess about five or six. (Dingdong once lived-in with Rachel Alejandro. He also has a love child with a non-showbiz girl. – RFL)

Dingdong is your first (serious) boyfriend, isn’t he? The others, including Gian Sotto, son of Sen. Tito Sotto and Helen Gamboa, were mere puppy love.

Jessa: Yes – and I really fought for him. Siya lang ang lalaking pinaglaban ko talaga.

Dingdong: Pinaglaban din naman kita, e.

You even fought with your own family, especially your mom.

Jessa: Before kasi, when my family didn’t like my suitor or boyfriend, bini-break ko. But with Dingdong, I really stood pat, talagang ipinaglaban ko. Mahal ko, e. And besides, alam kong tama ako, e.

What are naman your terms of endearment?

Dingdong: Honey!

When angry?

Dingdong (Pretending to be angry, raising his voice): Jessa!!! Richelle!!! (Richelle is Jessa’s real name. – RFL)

Jessa: I still call him "Honey!" even when I’m mad, madiin nga lang ang pagkaka-Honey.

Is your schedule better now that you’re not anymore Councilor of Quezon City?

Dingdong: I’m busier now with my career.

Didn’t you have any regrets that you didn’t win (in last May’s elections where he ran for reelection)?

Dingdong: Hindi naman. I just felt that I campaigned within the scale of kampanyang pang-konsehal. I don’t believe kasi in politics na sa pera lang, e. In short, I didn’t spend more than I should. I didn’t over-spend.

How much ba does a candidate for councilor need for the campaign?

Dingdong: Well, a big amount din but I don’t want to put it on record. Let’s put it this way: During the last election, I spent more than, double of, what I spent when I first ran in 1998.

You’ve been married for only nine months, so I suppose you’re into your adjustment period. Having lived-in with somebody once, it’s not so hard adjusting, Dingdong, is it?

Dingdong: You know, getting married is far different from living-in. This is it. It’s for life. Pang-habang-buhay na ’to. It’s final. When you just live-in, it seems so temporary. When you fight, that’s it, hiwalay na kayo kaagad. You’re not bound by anything. When you’re married, you think a hundred times before simply walking out on each other. When you fight, you perhaps leave the house for a while to cool off, magpalamig ng ulo, and things are okay again when you go home.

How do you settle your (petty, I suppose) quarrels?

Dingdong: We see to it that when we argue over something, when we fight, we try to settle things within the day. It’s not nice to go to bed with an emotional burden, is it?

What do you usually fight about?

Jessa (Widely smiling): When he messes up what I have fixed already. Ginugulo niya ’yung mga inaayos ko. I’m the one kasi who fixes our cabinet. You know naman the guys, when they get a shirt or a T-shirt, nagugulo ’yung ayos.

Dingdong: We’re both very organized. Other guys may be burara (disorderly) but I’m not.

Jessa: Yeah. Hindi naman siya burara.

What about other, well, "small" things, like pressing the toothpaste from the wrong end (a "bone of contention" between Martin Nievera and Pops Fernandez because Martin wanted it pressed from the bottom end but Pops would do it from the middle)?

Dingdong (Addressing Jessa): Di ba, Honey, sa gitna mo rin pini-press?

What about sleeping habits? Who sleeps on which side of the bed, with the lights and/or TV set on and/or off?

Dingdong: All she wants is for me to be beside her during bedtime.

Jessa: I can’t sleep without him beside me. He can play with the Play Station while we’re in bed. Okay lang, basta katabi ko siya.

Dingdong: But I seldom play naman with the Play Station. With a beautiful wife like Jessa beside you in bed, how can you still think of the Play Station?

Jessa: I’m an early sleeper. When I don’t have a show or don’t have to work, I’m asleep at 9:30 in the evening. I’m also an early-riser. Early to bed, early to rise ako.

Dingdong: Lately, I’ve been busy with my bar tour, so I sleep a bit late. When I was a councilor, I would sleep early because I had to wake up early to attend to visitors and callers in the office. I’m back to my old sleeping schedule, often sleeping late and waking up late (around 9 or 10 a.m.)

Jessa: TV habits? He’s fond of watching the basketball games.

Dingdong: But I see to it that I watch the newscasts.

What about reading in bed?

Dingdong: Not much. We’re not avid readers. But we do rehearse in bed.

Rehearse what?

Dingdong: Rehearse our songs… her songs or my songs. We help each other rehearse.

Side of the bed…

Dingdong: I’m on the right side.

Jessa: I’m on the left side, near the door because I wake up early. Besides, it’s the side farther from the aircon.

Dingdong: Lamigin si Jessa and we sometimes argue about it. I want the aircon very cold and she wants it "low cool" only. If she feels cold naman, ako ang kanyang human blanket.

Number of pillows in bed?

Jessa: I’m okay with just one.

Dingdong: Me? Five. We have six pillows. But the best pillow is, of course, Jessa. Masarap yakapin.

Jessa: Before we sleep, I’m the one who hugs him. But once we are asleep, he’s the one who hugs me na.

Who usually starts the, you know, "main event"?

Dingdong: It depends.

Jessa: Sometimes, he; sometimes, I.

It’s your first Christmas together as husband and wife. How do you plan to spend it?

Dingdong: We purposely have this place fixed so we can spend Christmas here. I thought we’d run out of time because we’ve been both very busy this year, doing promos and traveling abroad. We were both in the States last September. We were there when the World Trade Center was bombed. I’m now promoting my Christmas album (for Star Records), the carrier single of which is Ngayong Pasko.

Jessa: I’m also with Star Records and I’m now preparing my new album, to be released next year. Dingdong is also busy working on his new album.

Dingdong: We’re having a Valentine concert in February, to be entitled In Love (working title), hopefully at the Araneta Coliseum.

Do you have any theme song – perhaps You and Me Against the World?

Dingdong and Jessa (Together): Ngek!

Oh, yes, I forgot, it’s…

Dingdong: …The Glory of Love. Theme song of Karate Kid.

Jessa: Nice lyrics. It’s been my favorite since I was a child.

Dingdong: And then, all those issues against us came up, so tamang-tama sa amin ’yung song because, in the end, love triumphs.

No more in-law problems? Are you (to Dingdong) okay now with Jessa’s mom?

Dingdong: Her mom loves me. (Spoken without batting an eyelash)

Jessa: They’re even text-mates now.

And what about the baby? How soon do you plan to have one?

Dingdong: Next year.

Jessa: We’re really planning to have one next year. Planado talaga namin.

Any changes in your lives since you got married?

Dingdong: Well, pareho kaming hindi mahilig sa nightlife, we’re both homebodies, so we didn’t have any problem in that area. Our house is the product of blood, sweat and tears. We wanted it this way because we prefer staying home and going out, and sometimes inviting friends over.

Jessa: Part of the adjustment, but only in the beginning, was getting used to being with somebody beside you in bed, having somebody sharing the bathroom with you – you know, kung sino ang mauuna.

Dingdong: Sometimes, we use the bathroom together. It’s more fun!

Jessa: Mas okey ang ganoon.

Dingdong: I love married life. I love the idea of waking up in the morning with a beautiful woman beside me.

Jessa: He always greets me in the morning with a kiss, "Hi, Honey Baby!" I also greet him the same way. I wake up first, kaya ako ang alarm clock niya.

How do you break the monotony, if ever there is?

Dingdong: Before we even got married, I told Jessa, "The biggest enemy of a relationship is monotony." It’s not healthy to live a very routinary life. You should break the routine.

How?

Dingdong: By being spontaneous. Sometimes, out of the blue, I make love to her. Mga little surprises like that count a lot, di ba? Mga unplanned moves.

Jessa: Correct! Isulat mo ’yan, ha!

Dingdong: Sometimes, we have breakfast in bed. (Winking) If you know what I mean.

Incidentally, what’s your favorite line from The Glory of Love? Could you sing it together?

Dingdong and Jessa: (Singing together): … I am the man who will fight for your honor; I’ll be the hero…

Dingdong: But my personal favorite line from that song is this: Knowing together, we’ll live forever; knowing together we did it all for the glory of love…

(How sweet-sweet naman, di ba?)