Why me?” Ballsy Aquino-Cruz asked when told by Margie Juico, the former appointments secretary of her mom President Cory Aquino, that we wanted to interview her.
“I’m the most boring one here. Of course, Kris (Aquino) is the most popular personality,” Ballsy adds.
“Or why not Pinky (Aquino-Abellada), she’s the funniest, so very Aquino in that sense? She’s so pamparampam, meaning she’s so entertaining. We kid her: ‘Pinky, when God was looking at the assemblyline during creation, He forgot to to give you nerves.’ She’s so hyper and driven, you know. Pinky just finished her masters. She took her BS Economics at UP during martial law.’ She’s so go-go-go that when she decides on something, she gives it her all.
“Viel and I are more alike. But once, Mom told her: ’It’ good to be simple, but not too much.’
“When Mom died, Viel said she had no trouble looking for the right mourning clothes, because most of her clothes are in black, gray and brown.
“Viel says: ‘If you need matronic stuff, go to Ballsy.’ That’s because I have always been going with our mom all these years, and all the sosyalan I’ve attended have been with our mom’s friends.”
Why indeed, Ballsy? Because while we and the rest of the bereaved nation joined Kris Aquino shedding tears on television during the necrological rites for Cory, there Ballsy was, standing solid as a rock, her composure so calm, her aura so dignified, giving us strength and comfort when we needed it.
The big revelation was that when Ballsy started talking, she talked nonstop, never for a moment faltering. And she certainly was never boring. She was a most warm subject, generous with her stories. So very Aquino.
Here are excerpts from our Q&A:
1. It’s been 15 days since your mom passed away. For sure, you all miss her. Has she ever made her presence felt by you or any of your siblings?
Not yet, not even a paramdam. In fact, I would ask her: “Mom, please appear to me, even in a dream.” But I think Dad appeared to Mom the Tuesday before her death. Kris said she saw Mom looking upward, smiling and calling Ninoy’s name. That was when Kris told Mom: “Go, go, Mom, we’ll be okay.” But then Mom was into morphine. Later, the doctor said our mom was in a state of hepatic coma or deep sleep.
2. How about your dad Ninoy? Did he ever manifest himself to you or send a message?
Pinky is the only lucky one among us who saw Dad. Pinky said she saw Dad in a dream, and Dad was talking to her. “Kamusta na kayo? Ang guwapo ni Jesus! Ang saya dito (How are you guys? Jesus is so handsome! And this is such a happy place).”
3. What would you miss most about your mom?
You know, ever since Dad died in l983, Mom has been both mom and dad to us. She just knew what to say and do in whatever situation. In fact, when Dad was alive, we would tell Mom whatever problem or news we had to tell, but never to Dad. It was Mom who would break the news to Dad. When I wanted to get married, I said, ‘Mom, bahala ka na to tell Dad. You see, our dad could never bear the thought of bringing any of his daughters to the altar. For him, no man was ever good enough for any of his daughters.
Our mom was our bridge, our glue. Even when Dad was killed, she was always there to take all the hurts for us.When we got the news, my mom was so calm, and she told us never to get hysterical. She made us all kneel and pray the rosary with her. “This is how your dad wanted to go; he wanted to be able to do something for the country,” she told us.
4. People noted that during the necrological rites for your mom, you seemed the most serene, the most poised. In fact, they say you have that aura of dignity and that you in fact, look like Cory the most.
Funny but when I was a kid, they said I looked like an Aquino with my big and bulging eyes. I had such round eyes, my dad wanted to call me One Ball, and when I was born at eight and a half pounds, I looked like one big ball. Later, he changed it to Ballsy ... I really have my dad’s eyebrows that look putol (cut short), and my ears, my nose — my “hawk nose” — they’re so Aquino, our relatives tell me.
5. Some people say you should run because you are so like Cory, you would be an inspiration too.
Me, run? Politics is not for me, that’s why I made sure I married someone who would not enter politics. To be in politics, you really have to like it ... When Noynoy was running for senator, we didn’t even want to accept funds from certain people. Viel, who is the most scrupulous among us, would say: “Ay, wag tayo tumanggap diyan, smuggler yan ... Contributions? Pwede ba, wag na? Maghahanap na lang ako. (Let’s not accept help from people like smugglers. Contributions? Can I just look for other sources?)”
Honesty and integrity have been so imbibed in us by our parents. Even our Lola Aurora would tell us: “Be careful. El cambio, el cambio, mahirap!”
6. So how do you feel about the clamor to make your brother Noynoy run for president or vice president?
You know, when we were campaigning for Noynoy for senator, we would hear Mass at the Greenbelt chapel daily, and our mom really worked hard. We were all stressed because we heard that GMA would make sure Noynoy would lose ... So now, when we heard about this move to make Noynoy run for higher office, Viel texted him with a sad emoticon: “Noynoy, huwag na, please.” We told him, “Noy, nice naman what people are saying pero wag na, baka may magka-tumor pa diyan (don’t anymore, or someone among us might have a tumor due to stress.)”
But then there are people who tell us that being president is destiny. “Your mom never dreamed of becoming president, but look what happened.”
7. It looks like Noynoy will have a first lady if ever he becomes president.
Yes, his girlfriend (Shalani Soledad) is very nice and very pretty ... Mom once said that the best head of state is someone without a wife and without parents who could be meddling in affairs of the state ... But then, a politician will always need a supportive wife.
8. What was the most touching thing that Cory did for you that made you cry?
When I had my hysterectomy three years ago, Mom was there in the hospital every day. When I was bleeding, Mom knew I never wanted to go to hospitals for checkups, and it was she who accompanied me and convinced me to go. After my operation, Mom texted me: “I already have paintings that I will be giving as gifts to your doctors.” She also gave me money for my hospital bills. “Don’t worry about anything, just think of making yourself stronger,”she said.
9. How about your most unforgettable moment when she was president?
When we met Nelson Mandela, he told me: “You really know how to choose a mother!” To which my mom said: “And I can say that I really know how to choose a daughter!”
10. Margie (Juico) says you and your siblings have been spending time lately at your family’s Times Street residence the past days, organizing your mom’s things in preparation for a renovation. What are you choosing from the mementos from your mom?
In Mom’s room I found this journal with her handwritten quotations from the Bible. We agreed that Mom’s engagement ring should go to Kris. Pinky and Viel are more concerned with things they can pass on to their daughters, and Noynoy obviously is not even looking, because he says: “Anyway, I got all of Dad’s stuff.” Yes, he has been using Dad’s things, such as his cufflinks ... But actually, we each have our share of Mom’s journals and paintings ... As for her clothes and shoes, we were thinking of giving them away so people close to us, even our household help, can make use of them, because that’s what our mom would have wanted us to do ... But then Kris said we should keep them first and have them catalogued because her ABS-CBN bosses are planning to make a movie on our mom, and they would need some of her things.
10. Do you plan to put some Cory memorabilia on display at the Ninoy Aquino Museum in Tarlac?
Part of the museum already has been devoted to Mom. The gifts she received as president are already on display there, as well as the dress she wore during her oath-taking.
11. What are in the plans for the renovation to be done on Times Street?
That house was built in 1961, so we clearly need to install new plumbing and new electrical wiring. At first we thought of just renovating, but we were advised that it would be more practical to just build a new one. Some people are saying we shouldn’t tear the house down for sentimental reasons, but our mom was a practical person, and she would agree on having a new structure built instead. When Mom got sick, she told us, her daughters, that none of us would surely be interested in Times Street (as we have our own homes already), so she said: “Give it na to Noynoy.”
Mama Kris — that’s what we like calling her now — will take care of building the new house, especially the financial aspect. It will be a two-storey house that will include two rooms for Kris and Josh, since Times Street is so near ABS-CBN, and it was automatic for Josh to stay there after classes.
You know, Kris said she would really take care of Noynoy. Nice that she takes care even of his wardrobe, because Noynoy is absolutely walang vanity. He just keeps on wearing old barongs, and he likes them as long as they’re comfortable. That’s why Kris has asked Paul Cabral, JC Buendia and Randy Ortiz to do new barongs for Noynoy.
12. Speaking of houses, does your family still maintain the house in Boston where your family lived in exile during the Marcos years?
For a time, Pinky stayed there even as we had all gone back to Manila, because she was working with IBM in Boston. Then, when it was time for her to pack up, she went through the kitchen and never reached the rest of the house because she broke into tears when she remembered the happy times with our dad in that house.
We decided to sell it, but what a group of Filipino doctors did was raise money to buy it and save the house for the Aquino Foundation’s future museum. Eventually, they couldn’t afford the cost of maintaining it, and the house had to be sold to another buyer.
We were able to revisit our house though, because the new owner graciously allowed us to enter. My mom wanted her grandchildren to see the house where their grandfather Ninoy once lived. The facade is still the same, but the house interiors look so much nicer now. You see, when we were there, we were just so focused on spending precious time with Dad who had spent years in prison since the declaration of martial law.