What to do when your kids don’t want to do schoolwork

Most parents who have school-going kids might think that we homeschoolers have it easier when it comes to getting our kids to do bookwork. This is not true at all, and I’m sure my fellow homeschooling parents can attest to this.

The truth is, whether or not you are homeschoolers, there will be days when your kids won’t want to do their schoolwork. (Right? Right!) After all, kids will be kids, and we know there’s nothing inherently wrong with that.

However, we all know that our children also need to know that there’s a time for everything, as the Bible says in Ecclesiastes 3:1-8. There’s a time for play and a time for "work," or, in their case, schoolwork.

In our homeschool, "schoolwork" refers to bookwork, and usually consists of answering questions in a workbook, practicing writing, or doing math exercises. There are days when everything gets done in a breeze, and there are days when I feel like I’m pulling teeth just to get one math problem solved!

On challenging days like the latter, I ask God for extra patience, and turn to other parents for help. Usually, they are able to give great tips for getting kids to do their schoolwork.

Allow me to share a few of those parents’ tips here with you -- hopefully, you’ll find them helpful somehow, whether or not you’re a homeschooler:

Photo courtesy of David Castillo Dominici | FreeDigitalPhotos.net

Sheryl Alviz: "If my kids don’t want to do the tasks for the day, I simply stop everything, tell them to have a seat and talk to them about it. I ask them what they think is going on and what's getting in their way of doing their assigned tasks. I find out what their plans are after they're finished and try to motivate them to get the work done so they can move on to what they really want to do."

Ciara Carranza: “I plan a fun activity that we will only do after schoolwork.”

Jing de Guzman: "Learn to compromise. Practice the art of giving rewards and consequences."

Menchie Santos: "I try to provide alternative worksheets that are interesting but are still related to the topic at hand, hoping to get the task done somehow. If not, we try another subject."

Jen Wi-Bellosillo: "You may want to look into the reason for the behavior. One thing I learned about raising a child with special needs, which can be applied to both special and neuro-typical kids, is to understand the reason why. In behavior therapy, they call it ABC, which stands for Antecedent, Behavior and Consequence. Try to recall what happened before the refusal happened, and consider different factors -- lack of sleep, not feeling well, uninteresting or challenging lesson or just simply a bad time or day, etc.

Refusal to do the task assigned was the behavior and the way you both reacted to the situation was the consequence. Was the behavior a way to get your attention? Lots of hugs, love and understanding will make you both feel better, too." 

Remembering the abovementioned tips may be a bit challenging for most of us, especially on days when our kids are being too "difficult." However, since we are (supposedly!) the more "mature" ones, we shouldn’t let bad schoolwork days get to us -- and affect our relationship with our kids, too.

Instead, let’s remember that we just need to "do our best and let God do the rest," something my own parents would always say to me when I was still a student. Let’s encourage our kids to do the same, and, as Mommy Jen Wi-Bellosillo said in her tip, shower our kids with "hugs, love and understanding" too.

What do you do when your kids don’t want to do schoolwork (yes, homework counts, too!)? Share your tips with us by leaving a comment below or sending me a message.

P.S. Incidentally, the moms who shared the abovementioned tips are all homeschoolers enrolled with Catholic Filipino Academy (CFA). If you’re interested in learning more about homeschooling, specifically with CFA, please feel free to register for their Homeschooling Discovery Time in February. Just go to http://bit.ly/cfahdtfeb to do so. 

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