Switching off. Or on.
LOOKING ASKANCE - Joseph T. Gonzales (The Freeman) - December 8, 2019 - 12:00am

There's a new Asian trend - and it's making men obsolescent.

In South Korea, professional women are swearing off the opposite sex. That's the effect of a new movement reported in Seoul: the "Four Nos" or “4Bs,” which apparently means saying no to dating, sex, marriage, and children. (Seriously, even sex? At the very least, they could think about keeping boy toys? Why not just limit it to the “3Bs”?)

The trend is an evolutionary response by educated Korean women, who were hitting glass ceilings in their career. These women were being forced by traditional societal roles to take care of their men and children while trying to succeed in the corporate world. Oh, I forgot. They were also expected to take care of their in-laws.

So all of those burdens were being foisted on Korean women, to the extent that now, they're doing the hippie equivalent of "burn the bra!” Over in Seoul, it's "burn the boys!" So, they’re proclaiming who cares if they ever get married. Men are unnecessary!

So harsh. What's going to happen to all those loveless Korean men? (Not to mention the worsening population decline that’s being seen not just in Seoul, but in other Asian tigers?)

That’s not the end of it. Not too far away in Beijing, mainland Chinese women are thinking that relationships with real men aren't worth the effort, and so they are turning to virtual men. AFP reports that middle-income young Chinese women want to focus on careers, so who has time for dating, marriage, and childbearing and rearing?

Instead, what these Chinoise women do is to look for online relationships that they (gulp) pay for. Wechat and other sites are available where they can hunt for their virtual partner. Someone they talk to and text for a fee, and maybe, they can even ask for something more. There might be flirtations and assignations, secrets shared and souls (and more) bared.

But both parties know that this isn't the real deal, at least for now. At the moment, at the heart (pun intended) - all it is, is a transaction - time for money, and the woman can get out any time by stopping payment. (I'm an expert listener - I think I see an alternative career for myself.)

And Chinese men are okay with it - at least they get paid for their time while listening to women b*tch about their issues. So that works out well (sort of) in the end.

So, men all over the world - be warned. Women are starting to lose their patience for you and your preconceptions and expectations. They have no time for you, and so you may just end up the way of those Japanese guys who buy rubber dolls and bring them home.

I refer to a unique Japanese phenomenon that might just catch on with the rest of the world. Bereft of woman-love? Substitute them with mannequins! Lonely Japanese men (and even those who were married and with kids) have been noted to have been transferring their emotional and physical needs to silicone substitutes. Thousands of these dolls have been sold in Japan, so obviously, a lot of lovin’ is missin’ in samurai country.

Is this the way forward for Asia? And on that vein, is this the same path that’s going to be taken by the Philippines?

Time will tell. Meanwhile, shopping online has become so big here, what with Tinder and other apps. I mean, Lazada and Shopee. (Sheesh, what was I thinking.)


  • Latest
Are you sure you want to log out?

Philstar.com is one of the most vibrant, opinionated, discerning communities of readers on cyberspace. With your meaningful insights, help shape the stories that can shape the country. Sign up now!

or sign in with