The fuss over football

I heard someone say in a tv show: “All the beauties in the Bb. Pilipinas beauty pageant are beautiful.” Come again?

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Reminds me of what I once read somewhere. It said that there’s this warning in a hot coffee cup: “Careful, hot coffee is hot.”

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From a sports column I came across this line and I was amused: “The shortest player is 4 feet tall.” Amusing but how else could you say that?

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I once wrote in my Cebuano language column: “Ang sukod sa iyang tiil mas dako gamay kaysaakoa.” Dako gamay? A Masscom intern laughed.

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My friend Anick (Anastacio Nicacor) got married to a British woman in New York where he has been living for 16 years. He divorced her because, Anick said, she always forgot to flush the toilet.

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Anick is in town for his Christmas vacation. He is with a new woman, a Cuban. She’s a divorcee but pretty and sexy and doesn’t forget to flush the toilet. But Anick says the woman has a bad habit. She likes to smoke cigar in bed.

 “What cigar?” I asked. “Abano gud,” Anick said.

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There’s currently a fuss here over soccer football because the Pinoy Azkals beat — in fact, upset — Vietnam, 2-0, in the Suzuki Cup. Let me add fuel to the fuss. OK?

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Did you know that two small island-nations in the Pacific have competed in the World Cup? In 2001, Tonga played Australia in the qualifying round and got crushed, 22-0. Then American Samoa faced the Aussies and got demolished too, 31-0.

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Tonga and American Samoa got clobbered bad but at least they tried in the World Cup qualifier. The Philippines could hardly even win in the qualifying stage of the prestigious Cup because basketball is our cup of tea. Tst-tsk.

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E-mail from Bibsy Collantes, a Cebuano engineer in Bacolod City: “May I suggest thru your column? Governor Gwen and former Mayor Tom O should be nominated jointly for the Dog & Cat Award. They deserve each other as well as the said award.”

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