Suma-sideline

Mr. DJ, Can I make a request, Puwede be ‘tong love song ko?— Mr. DJ popularized by Sharon Cuneta and composed by Rey Valera

In a world where boredom is a dreaded disease, we must find creative ways to keep life exciting. For those who can’t commit to something as drastic as a career change, I’d like to propose taking a sideline job to dip into a pool of new possibilities. Depending on one’s age, religion and beliefs, one may live out their fantasies in different ways.

If you were Madonna, you would reinvent yourself every time you sing a new song. If you were a chameleon, you’d simply change color. If you were five, you’d play “dress up.” If you were in college, you’d shift to another course. If you were a drag queen, you’d be reincarnated as Marilyn Monroe, Cher or Lady Gaga. If you were a zebra in the jungle, you’d trade in your stripes for the giraffe’s spots. If you were the madhatter, you’d switch head gear. But we are simply us, so the question is...

If you could trade places with someone, who would you be?

If my attempt for a little “audience participation” isn’t working, let’s add a little logic to this game and put money into the equation to make this “daydreaming sequence” a little more enticing.

 Sa hirap ng buhay ngayon…what would your sideline job be?

The most amusingly desperate sideline job has to belong to Anne Hathaway in the movie Valentine’s Day where she plays an assistant moonlighting as an adult phone sex worker to pay off her student loan. In reality, some of the more interesting sideline jobs I’ve come across require one to comment in blogs and chat in an Internet forum. And of course everyone who has been to Boracay recently has seen the walking billboards for a noodle soup brand. This marketing strategy may be a new trend because these human ads have also infiltrated Makati Avenue. EDSA must already be compromised with ads in every square foot!

Some sideline jobs are born out of necessity and some spring up to help pass the time. When I had a week off before my workload was scheduled to pile up, I mentioned to my good friend DJ Suzy that I wanted to be a guest DJ on Magic 89.9. As luck would have it, she said Boom Gonzalez was planning to ask me to fill in for DJ Mia while she took a short vacation. That’s where the adventure began…

SIDELINE JOB #1: Radio DJ

PEGS:

1. Mo Twister (Good Times with Mo, Mojo Jojo, Grace Lee and Angelicopter of Magic 89.9)

2. Kris Tsuper and Nicole Hyala (Tambalan ng isang Balasubas at isang Balahura of 90.7 Love Radio)

3. Ryan Seacrest (America’s Top 40 of Magic 89.9)

MOVIES/TV SHOWS TO WATCH:

1. Radyo starring Epy Quizon and Rufa Mae Quinto

2. ABS-CBN show Midnight Phantom starring Denise Laurel and Rafael Rosell

THE DREAM:

The first time I pretended to be a DJ was for a radio show I produced with my high school groupmates in a cassette tape for our media class. Being a DJ has been my secret dream since then along with becoming the voice of a Disney animation or the voice you hear when you enter some kind of theme park ride or even just an elevator message: “Welcome to Enchanted Kingdom” or simply “the doors are closing.”

THE REQUIREMENTS:

1. Impeccable English.

2. Basic knowledge of American gossip and Twitter trending topics.

3. A knack for otherwise useless and senseless trivia tidbits made newsworthy all around the world by the international phenomenon I’d like to call “silly news” which balances out all the bad news that exists.

4. Multitasking skills for the new breed of highly-interactive listeners. In addition to the impossibly busy radio station phone line, there is an official text line which is linked to a computer. Plus thanks to the Internet: You need to be on Twitter, the Magic Facebook page, your own Facebook page, the UStream video and live chat. You must also acknowledge the friends and family who text you to greet them. It’s quite overwhelming at first because of the number of windows actively popping up to get my attention on my laptop. Who knew it would be so hard to greet a bunch of people and make sure they hear their favorite songs?

5. Reading skills. One must read names of singers/bands and their songs.

6. Rapport with your radio partner — lots of bonding is necessary.

SURVIVAL SKILLS:

1. You must own a laptop with active accounts on all the social networking sites.

2. Ability to make a comeback after being barok or saying something stupid. You have to be able to laugh at yourself.

PERKS OF THE JOB:

1. Being greeted on the radio always puts me on a great mood. This is the reason why I also love making the listeners happy.

2. DJs are usually given loads of gift certificates and sponsorships.

3. Listeners usually visit the radio station to bring you food or coffee. Listeners are welcome to use the very comfy Magic couch. It is much like the days of old when you would see people in the streets crowding around the radio stations in black and white films.

Being a radio rockstar was fun while it lasted, I had a welcome lunch and I baked everyone cookies and mini cakes for my second and last day. Bribing my officemates with sweets worked because I’ve been back two other times after my last day on the job. I also enjoyed filling in for CJ the DJ on the Big Meal when he was absent. I’m very flattered about the great reviews I got — hint hint, wink wink!

What is your favorite hobby?

A: Ramp modeling in the hallways

I’m a model

You know what I mean

 And I do my little turn on the catwalk

 — I’m too sexy

popularized by Right Said Fred and composed by Fred and Richard Fairbrass, Robert Manzoli

SIDELINE JOB #2: SUPERMODEL

PEGS:

1. Filipina Supermodel Anna Bayle for her world-famous fabulous catwalk style.

2. Giselle Bündchen.

MOVIES/TV SHOWS TO WATCH:

Zoolander, Miss Congeniality, America’s Next Top Model

Don’t laugh, but every time I see a long, empty corridor I like to “strut my stuff” especially if I come across a gay friend. Upon seeing said friend, it takes us exactly two seconds to know that we will have a Zoolander catwalk face-off. This often happens in the A.S.A.P. corridor in ABS-CBN where there are plenty people whom I can gamely share a “Padilla family pout” with.

You don’t know the joy I felt when the prestigious Metro Magazine asked me to be a part of the Metrowear Fashion show. I was asked to model Reian Mata’s pink ballerina-inspired creations. I felt like a real model because I was only one of four non-models namely Megan Young, Maricar Reyes and Carmen Soo. I felt great in the fashion show but my utter joy worsened the state of my Grade 1 modeling skills with a walk that was a tad too bouncy. Lesson learned, I called in for reinforcements for the biggest fashion event in the Philippines otherwise known as Bench Uncut. What’s a dream job without a fairy godmother or in this case a sexy genie in a bottle we shall call Divine Lee? It may not be obvious but a lot of work goes into a one-minute ramp on the catwalk.

The 911 CALL:

Caller: “Div, I have a fashion show emergency…You have to cure my bouncy walk!”

911 operator a.k.a. Divine: “I will call the Beckys and we will help you.”

It’s good to have friends who understand your problems which would seem rather shallow to most. I walked into Divine’s condominium and she transformed to “strict Principal Lee” with her faculty made up of young talented designers: Martin Bautista, Veejay Floresca, and Patrick Galang. We were later joined by a guest teacher, professional model trainer Aleq Africa. As we basked in our serious task, The Philippine Star Supreme’s David Milan and Jigs Mayuga observed us from the dining room table.

CLASS IS IN SESSION

Lesson 1: GLIDING BAREFOOT

Think Twilight and the way Edward and the rest of the Cullens just seem to float through a room. I was a bit shy at first but since everyone was so game, I eventually got the hang of it.

Lesson 2: GLIDING IN HEELS

Some of my teachers demonstrated how to stride in Divine’s size 10 Louboutin heels.

Lesson 3: ESTABLISH

Establish is the term used when a model strikes a pose upon hitting markers/stopping points. We had to choose between certain poses to find the one that was most flattering to my body type. The faculty decided it was best to use an “italicized 11” pose where the feet form the number 11 in a slanted style.

Lesson 4: THE ARM SWING

For some weird reason, my right arm moved correctly but my left hand was all wrong. To fix this, they simply told me to put my left hand on my waist.

Lesson 5: FIND THE FLAIR

For inspiration, we watched Miss World Venezuela 2010 Adriana Vasini play with her scarf in a swimsuit competition on YouTube.

Lesson 6: WORDS TO LIVE BY

Find your own style. Be comfortable and enjoy yourself.

THE ESSENTIALS:

1. Your STILETTOS are your best friend. The trick is to always carry a set of tsinelas or slippers whenever you’re on break so you don’t tire your legs too much.

2. You need HAIR SPRAY to make sure your heels are sticky on the slippery floor. When I danced ballet, we would use resin. You could also use Coca-Cola.

3. If you are only 5’4” like me, you will feel very short! PEP TALKS from friends and family are essential (thank you to Iza Calzado who gave me one right before the show) because you’ll be surrounded by perfection in human form. It’s a little hard to feel literally small around statuesque supermodels.

4. KEEP YOUR TEMPER IN CHECK. Hungry people are usually in a bad mood, so try to keep it cool if you are on a diet.

5. KNOW YOUR BLOCKING. I asked someone to take a video of my segment so I could review the music and blocking before the show.

SURVIVAL SKILLS

I have so much respect for kikay girls because some kikay tasks are extremely painful. A lot of work and money (thank God for sponsors) goes into being picture perfect for a fashion show where countless cameras click away.

BEAUTY MAKE-OVER FROM HEAD TO TOE:

1. Hair color — This is very boring because it takes so long.

2. Haircut by Cristi Dizon at Essensuals Toni & Guy.

3. Eyebrow threading — This is quite bearable but sometimes I naturally tear during the process

4. Facial — I always have the lovely fruity smelling Botanical cleaning. My face usually gets red after a facial so I always have the ice mask applied after.

5. Manicure/pedicure — Nail Craft 62.

6. Belo multipolar — This almost feels like a massage. It’s a treatment that uses radio frequency technology to employ controlled superficial heating to contour and tighten your skin.

7. Belo biosculpt. Dr. Vicki Belo told me this machine is actually used by Derek Ramsay. I think we all know what his abs look like and with that statement alone, I knew I had to try it. It was strange because it tickled in the beginning until it began to hurt. There are levels of intensity and I was able to go from the ticklish 10 to intense 90.

8. Airbrush tanning with Bianca Valerio — I went to the beach five times last summer which is why I’m darker than usual. I wanted to emphasize my tan and even out my messy tan lines from my bikini and jogging outfits. A dark complexion is favorable because a whiter complexion makes one gain more pounds onscreen. Contrary to popular belief, kayumanggi rules!

9. Pilates with my trainer Bax. Deeta Von Teese, Madonna and Gwen Stefani have talked about Pilates in their interviews which is why I’m convinced it works.

10. Jogging thrice a week with coach Allan Ballester of the Run Rio Team.

11. Gym time at Gold’s gym.

12. Diet — I didn’t really diet much but I did eat fruits before my regular meals. I also switched from white rice to brown rice.

13. Foot massage at Blue Water Day Spa. I needed to pamper my legs which had endured a 5K Fun Run over the weekend to be followed by two days in sky high stilettos.

I am thankful I am not a real model because I don’t think I can handle the pressure of living this kind of life every single day. But I will forever be thankful to Mr. Ben Chan who made all this possible. He is the man behind the very sexy show of force in Araneta. This year’s show had an underlying global theme taken from the tagline “Uncut: A Bold Look into the future.” Previously unknown to many, Bench is already making its mark the world over. Ben Chan and his team have created a new benchmark for a homegrown Filipino company for others to follow.  There are 98 company-owned Bench boutiques, 10 Herbench stores and 16 Bench Body stores scattered around the Philippines. In addition to this, the Philippines is also home to the following franchise stores: One Bench Body, one Her Bench, and 24 Bench boutiques.  In China, there are 38 company-owned Bench stores and 10 franchise stores. There are also two stores in the US and 13 franchise stores in the Middle East.

To match the ever-growing brand, this year’s Bench fashion extravaganza merged two brilliant minds from the TV and the fashion world: Directors Johnny Manahan a.k.a. Mr. M and Robbie Carmona together with his Saga Events team. Throw in choreographer Joane Laygo into the loop with 75 dancers (58 local, five Russians, 12 L.A. dancers). Head stylist Noel Manapat mixed and matched roughly 300 pieces of underwear including one famous crystallized jock strap for 102 male models, 49 female models and 69 celebrities. Together with Joey Samson, five Dubai-based fashion designers namely Furne One, Cary Santiago, Doro Barandino, Val Taguba, Ezra Santos and Michael Cinco added a dash more of sparkle to the show. 

With all that said, I have to say that I had the time of my life on that stage. But what it all boils down to is that my growling tummy signaled how hungry I was. Right after the show, I called my friend Shin from Arya who prepared a big meal of kebabs and beryani rice for me which I ate in less than 10 minutes. My big appetite for food clashes with this modeling stint.

“Variety is the spice of life” and while most women react when men use this as an excuse for philandering. There are more apt applications to this saying such as my recent adventures that I’ve just shared with you. I think we’re allowed for the sake of keeping things interesting to explore different aspects of our personality. I love my life, don’t get me wrong. I am ever so lucky that in my profession, I am able to do some sideline jobs.

Twitter all you can@anakarylle asked the question:

Q: What are your sideline jobs?

A: @shylanei encoder for a month while on vacation in the Philippines.

@MARIUS_DTOWN, a club promoter in LA and

@jquintero87 simply answered on-line surveys.

blogger and famous stylist @jennieeperson sells youthful accessories and clothes on her on-line boutique http://cuteture.multiply.com

account manager @shur styles models for FHM.

Show comments