As of now, so then, but more so

For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh. – Ephesians 5:31

A lonesome male went to a singles group in search of a bride. Meeting a lonely, very attractive woman, he said: “Look, I’m pretty ordinary and don’t have much money right now, but my dying dad is a multimillionaire and since he has no wife, I’m going to inherit his fortune. And I’m looking for someone to share it with.”

“I’m interested,” she said, adding, “But before I’d consider marriage with you, I think it would be fitting for me to go to the hospital and pay my respects to your dying father.” She did, and married the dying father.

If you have money, a nice car, good looks or can charm people, getting married is not exceedingly difficult. Staying married, however, is another matter, and staying happily married is in a category of its own. Harry Blackmun, a late US Supreme Court justice, once cautioned a bride and groom saying, “A wedding is an event; a marriage is an achievement.” He was right.

A really successful marriage is a crowning achievement of two people who are deeply committed to each other. What are the factors that go into that kind of a marriage? Try these for starters: (1) A spiritual purpose for their lives, which includes a relationship with God; (2) A deep, unshakeable commitment to each other; (3) The determination to live each for the other, putting the other first; (4) Free and open communication, sharing hearts as well as bedrooms; (5) The strength of character to forgive quickly and to let go of petty grievances, realizing that you can’t fight and die on every bump in the road. And, finally, a short memory when it comes to each other’s faults and failures.

Whether you are miserable or have a happy disposition before marriage, walking down the aisle and exchanging vows will only result in greater feelings either way.

Used with permission from Guidelines International Ministries. To learn more about Guidelines and the ministry, send an e-mail to [email protected]. You may also visit www.guidelines.org.