‘Ah want mah guns!’

Seems very much out of character, but I once did own a gun. It wasn’t my choice or decision; a very kind and concerned friend thought my profession put me in some danger, and since I drive home alone in the evenings, he thought I should have some protection.

So he got me a little gun, about as big as my hand, and a box of ammunition. He helped me with all the necessary permits (to own and to carry outside of residence), and even offered to schedule lessons at a shooting range.

I gave the idea some thought, but in the end, discretion being the better part of valor, I decided the firearm and everyone around me – actually, myself included – would be safer if I kept it tucked away somewhere inaccessible. I just could not see myself actually using the gun, except perhaps on that bus driver doing his best to ram my car or the suicidal motorcycle guy darting in front of me without warning…but that would be really really bad. So the gun stayed in the camphor chest (with all the woolens!), the cellophane wrapper of the box of bullets intact.

When the permits expired and I looked into renewing them, I was floored by all the requirements. So I got in touch with a friend in the PNP – who happened to be with the PNP firearms and explosives office – about surrendering the gun. He arranged for it to be turned in and then given to a police officer, so one fine day I went to Camp Crame with the gun and box of bullets wrapped in a nondescript paper bag inside my handbag and accomplished the necessary paperwork.

This episode comes to mind in the light of all the gun violence in the US dominating the news. It is nothing short of horrifying. The incidents of mass shootings seem to have become commonplace – in schools, supermarkets, parking lots, as ordinary as people owning guns. A 2018 survey showed that there were 120.5 guns per 100 civilian residents in the US; by contrast, in Lebanon it was 31.9 per 100.

And not just guns but assault weapons. The Uvalde, Texas shooter had two semi-automatic rifles and 375 rounds of ammunition, bought right after he turned 18. What did you get for your 18th birthday?

In 2016, a former colleague who had migrated to the US came home with her husband, an elderly Texan who owned a ranch. It was a couple of months before the elections, and over lunch he tore into then candidate Hillary Clinton, saying how bad she would be for America. He said that as soon as they got back to Texas he’d go and buy not one but two assault rifles to add to his arsenal of 22 firearms.

I asked in shock who he intended to shoot with that deadly weapon, hopefully not his wife! He answered, “Ah ain’t shootin’ anyone, but ah just want mah guns! And Hillary’s gonna take mah guns away, so ah better get ’em quick.”