'Goldilocks and the Three Bears'
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Love in the time of COVID-19: 'Goldilocks,' porn boom; but how about baby boom?
Ratziel San Juan (Philstar.com) - March 27, 2020 - 1:30pm

MANILA, Philippines — The virus which causes the new coronavirus disease (COVID-19) has not been confirmed by leading health experts to be airborne except within the confined hospital setting.

Related: Is COVID-19 airborne? Can bananas save you? DOH sets record straight

.Some people, however, observed that love is in the air and suggested that others may be doing more than just self-quarantining at home.

Juxtaposing the Baby Boomers demographic born between 1946 and 1964, where massive global population growth was attributed to the end of World War II, many people are predicting a spike in births toward year’s end.

The question being asked is whether people will be “turned on” as lockdowns and home quarantines mount worldwide.

Hence the December projection of “Coronnials” — babies expected to be born nine months from now.

Related: From 'Coronnials' to 'quaranteens': Internet users predict future of kids named after COVID-19

But is the claim plausible?

What experts say

Short answer: It’s too early to tell as research remains scant and the phenomenon being discussed (increased births capping 2020) has yet to even take place or not.

Conversely, if we do see a baby boom, novel coronavirus disease 2019 (COVID-19) pandemic wouldn’t be the only factor at play as found by related literature.

The correlation between increased birth rate and prior catastrophic events that incapacitate much of the population has been studied since the "Great Blackout" that hit New York City in November 1965, when power outages lasting up to 10 hours was claimed to have increased local births nine months later, said a Times article.

Sociologist J. Richard Udry, using comparable periods for the five years preceding the blackout as reference, found in his landmark 1970 study that the baby boom claims lacked statistical significance in terms of increase or decrease in sexual activity leading to birth during the said blackout.

Decades later, fact-checking site Snopes debunked allegations that the aftermath of the Sep. 11, 2001 terrorist attacks in the United States would lead to a baby boom.

In a report published a year after the said attacks, Snopes disproved that “hospitals experienced a sharp increase in births nine months after September 11.”

Moreover, clinical psychologist and author David Ley in a Tuesday article said that he disagreed with views, including that of social psychologist Justin Lehmiller, that quarantines during the pandemic are leaving people aroused.

“Online, there’s a big surge in things such as quarantine porn, and tweets about people reporting how sex-starved they are, as well as revealing that they are getting contacted by ex-partners, desperate for hook-ups. And perhaps there is a surge in such things, but it’s still unlikely, in my opinion, that there will be a baby boom in nine months,” Ley said in a Psychology Today report.

Internet trends birthed

Whether or not we will see a COVID-19-triggered baby boom around December is up for social scientists to study after the “fact.”

In an informal sense, however, anecdotal evidence might indicate that people under quarantine are indeed starving for intercourse.

Home-trapped netizens are experiencing a different kind of “cabin fever” and are taking to social media to air their thirsty frustrations.

An NSFW subreddit dedicated to alleviating people's desires has also sprung, with over 2,000 members two weeks after it was created.

"A place to post pics and vids of your sexy time during the quarantine! Feel free to post OC or Crosspost from other subs! Make sure all posts have something to do with the COVID-19 Quarantine! Cheers!" read the description of "r/QuarantineGoneWild."

Interest in “quarantine porn” noticeably went up worldwide based on Google data.

Popular titles that have collectively amassed over half a million views on adult streaming sites include "Bodycam Footage (CDC Agent) Investigates COVID-19 - Coronavirus Porn," "TSA Agent detains woman suspected of Coronavirus COVID-19," and "H***y  s**t has to use proection during outbreak!"

'The End of the F***ing World'

Speaking of libido, the COVID-19-associated sex drive might be hitting closer to home than we think.

In case you’ve been wondering why “Goldilocks” has been trending on social media in the middle of the COVID-19 outbreak — no, the bakery chain has not been giving out cakes and other goods.

Rather, it’s the other way around, as suggested by online users in reference to a viral video circulating internet feeds over the past week where a fully undressed couple are seen publicly “putting the bread in the oven,” “glazing the donut,” or “buttering the biscuit” in front of a local Goldilocks store.

The “action” took place in full view of motorists and visibly disturbed onlookers, some of whom protected by face masks.

A security guard is seen dispersing spectators but unable to contracept – or intercept – the bird and the bee.

“Ganito Ang Libangan kapag bored at makakakuha Quarantine (This is what quarantine boredom does to people),” read the caption of Sunday post where the two-minute uncensored video was uploaded.

BABY BOOM CORONNIALS ENHANCED COMMUNITY QUARANTINE GOLDILOCKS LUZON ENHANCED COMMUNITY QUARANTINE NOVEL CORONAVIRUS QUARANTINE PORN
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