TJ Monterde recalls nearly giving up music career before hit 'Palagi'

MANILA, Philippines — Singer-songwriter TJ Monterde has come a long way from the time when he nearly gave up on his music career.

Today, he is not only able to pursue the career he once doubted but is also in a position to give back to his wife, singer KZ Tandingan, who stood by him during one of the most challenging periods of his life.

Last month, TJ gifted KZ with their dream lot, where they plan to build their dream home.

But before reaching the milestone, TJ recalled a time when he struggled with doubts about his career and their financial situation.

In an interview with Kara David for “i-Listen,” TJ described his journey in the music industry as a “bit of a slow burn.”

One of his early hits was “Tulad Mo,” which was released in 2015.

“So paunti-unti tapos ‘yung time na ‘yun, nanliligaw na ako kay KZ. Tapos may mga times pa no’n na parang ini-issue ako na, ‘Ginagamit mo lang naman si KZ kasi sikat siya e,’” TJ recalled.

The comments made TJ question whether he belonged in the industry, particularly as he was still establishing himself as an artist.

“So ‘yun ‘yung mga times na napapaisip na ako, parang, huwag na lang kaya. ‘Yun na ‘yung unti-unti nang pumapasok sa head ko na baka hindi for me,” he said.

Still, his career gradually gained momentum.

“Tapos paunti-unti, nagkaka-hit naman. And somehow, may still small voice na tuloy mo lang, may pupuntahan ‘yan kahit papaano,” he added.

The turning point came in 2020, when the COVID-19 pandemic further complicated TJ’s already uncertain career.

“Parang nag-decide na ako na wala na. May songs naman ako, okay naman. Alam mo ‘yung parang kilala ka naman nila pero hindi talaga dumidiretso,” he said.

Surviving COVID-19

TJ considered leaving music altogether and opening a coffee shop instead.

He also told KZ that perhaps she could continue with her music career while he looked for other sources of income.

But KZ refused to let him give up on his dream.

“Kung wala ka nang tiwala sa sarili mo, may tiwala ako sa ‘yo. Sabi niya, ‘Ako muna magsu-support kung kailangan.’ Kasi nu’ng time na ‘yun, wala na, pandemic pa. Depleted na talaga ako,” TJ recalled.

The singer-songwriter admitted that KZ was then doing better professionally and financially.

“That time, si KZ mas maganda ‘yung career niya kaysa sa akin. So siya ‘yung nagpo-provide mostly sa aming lahat,” he said.

Instead of dwelling on their reversed financial roles, TJ focused on the ways he could support his wife.

“The least I could do was… gigising siya for show niya, gigising ako maaga, magluluto ako. Kung ano ‘yung kaya kong i-prepare: prepare her clothes, steam her clothes, ida-drive ko siya, ihahatid ko siya, susunduin ko siya. That’s the least I can do,” he said.

Breakthrough

TJ said he never felt insecure about KZ being the primary provider at the time.

“For some weird reason, wala akong insecurity. Kasi grabe i-handle ni KZ ‘yung situation, na parang walang kahit isang sumbat,” he said.

KZ also repeatedly assured him that his own time would come.

“Darating ‘yung time mo, nandito lang ako. Magsu-support ako sa ‘yo even if ito muna ‘yung situation natin ngayon,” TJ quoted his wife as saying.

TJ eventually experienced the breakthrough he had been waiting for through “Palagi.”

Before writing the song, however, he said he had already reached the point of surrendering his music career to God.

“Sabi ko, ‘Lord, wala na ‘to. Ayoko na, give na ako. Thank you for the talent. Thank you for the chance. Thank you for all those times. But I think I’ve written my best songs already,’” he said.

At the time, TJ had also become an independent artist, which meant he had to navigate the industry without the machinery and support of a major label.

“Parang paano ko mahihigitan ‘yung songs ko dati. Grabe ‘yung pressure sa akin. Pero, I surrendered everything to God,” he said.

He then made a personal declaration about his songwriting.

“Lord, it’s not about my songwriting, but it’s about your blessing. Even if I make the most beautiful song in the world, if it doesn’t have your blessing, walang sense lahat ng ‘to.’ And that was when I wrote ‘Palagi,’” TJ recalled.

Not written as a hit

Interestingly, TJ did not initially write “Palagi” with the intention of creating a hit.

The song was meant to celebrate a milestone in his relationship with KZ.

“It was just a celebration for a celebration, milestone namin ni KZ. Ten years simula nu’ng makilala ko siya, parang cinelebrate namin ‘yung day na ‘yun,” he said.

TJ performed the song during a surprise dinner he prepared for KZ.

“And sobrang nagustuhan niya, parang, ‘Babe, ang ganda ng song na ‘to,’ sabi niya. So we decided to record it,” he recalled.

What happened next exceeded his expectations.

“After namin i-record ‘yun na, wildfire everywhere. It was everywhere. And nagkaka-confidence na ako ulit,” TJ said.

The success of “Palagi” made him realize that his career was far from over.

“Sabi ko, ‘Lord, mayroon pa pala. Parang, hindi pa pala tapos. Akala ko tapos na.’”

More invitations followed, while TJ also began seeing the financial benefits of his music as an independent artist.

“And one thing I was so happy about was ‘yung unti-unti kaya ko ng mag-provide,” he said.

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