Of sportsmen and statesmen

Gracious in defeat, magnanimous in victory. This is the timeless, unwritten code of conduct best gauged by how winners and losers initially react and later say during post-match interview. Playing sports unwittingly reveals who you are, tennis in particular. It either brings out the best or the worst in you. How you behave under pressure tests character, especially at crunch time.

Although Serena Williams has been notorious for her on-court meltdowns, she gives credit where credit is due. Looking back at her loss to Lindsay Davenport, she conceded Lindsay played so well that night there was nothing she can do. When she lost to Simona Halep in last year’s Wimbledon final, she self-deprecated, likened her game to a deer in front of the headlights.

Andre Agassi compared his rival Pete Sampras to Roger Federer – there was a way to Pete but not to Roger. Steffi Graf described the game of her lesser known conqueror as the best any woman has ever played against her. Great champions with greater poise, saying words and phrases that commonly acknowledge they lost because the other played better. That simple, no ifs or buts, something scarce among some Filipinos who lose tennis match in local clubs or leagues.

Never to appreciate their opponent, they attribute their loss to practically anything except their bad game. No warm-up, out of condition, injury, poor eyesight or intoxication the night before. Why play if not ready? It could be garbage stench, dusty or muddy surface, excruciating heat or flickering light, like the winner was in another dimension and never experienced similar gripe.

  Crowd too loud. Come on, tennis is mental as it is physical. Focus, man. The crowd may heckle or boo, but execute what you need to do. Or bad calls that unfortunately happen and could change course of the entire game. Where there is discretion, the umpire is bound to be under fire. It’s part of the game. Let go. Move on to the next point. Again, it’s mental.

But worse, they blame their doubles partner for bungling points especially a clincher. Like you never double faulted, hit a backhand long or wide, netted a forehand or missed an easy overhead smash? Introspect. If indeed your partner sucked, never verbalize it, let him say and apologize for it. If he does neither, others will, but never you. It’s rude and condescending. No one errs to lose on purpose where pride is at stake, except when game is fixed.

Sore or hard losers, whichever way you describe them to be. They never concede. Just like some of our losing politicians who cry fraud all the time, blaming election administrators, inspectors, canvassers, or the counting machines, never accepting painful reality of rejection. If we were to believe them then, there would only be two kinds of candidates coming out after dust settled – the winner and the cheated. No one loses. And yet they run again the next time. Being cheated on must be enjoyable sensation.

Unsolicited advice – please self-actualize. It’s more humbling than humiliating. If you lose fair and square, be it in sports, election or any life venture, don’t hate, just congratulate, etiquette dictates. If you don’t feel like doing it, fake it at least. Don’t feel guilty for being phony. Everybody is. Call it civility, not falsity. Or better yet, dignity.