What the “F” word


I read books and I have read a lot of books throughout my entire lifetime. Some books changed my life for the better. Some books equipped me with the skills not only for doing business but for living life correctly, and there were also a lot of books which wasted my time. Either they are a rehash of old ideas of the author’s previous bestsellers or a presentation of old ideas told in a more contemporary way. Books make a difference. I love non-fiction books, business books, and most importantly, I love inspiring books that present solid values equipping me to live life correctly and raise my family well.

A good book consumes me. Time flies, and I cannot wait to flip over to the next page and discover a truth that I have not known. You will see that you have in possession a book that matters to you when you have reached the final page of it, yet you still hold on to it wishing that there is more. Some good books never see the light of day. Although published, these books have been assigned to occupy some dark and deeper shelves of bookstores. And so, these are missed, ignored, and never bought; and so, they are not read. Some not-so-good-books make it to the bestseller’s list because of smart and clever marketing strategies. And the more their books sell, the more visible you see them guesting in TV talk shows and their works being “quoted” by speakers in the lecture circuit. Others become so popular; their work becomes part of everyday conversation, and this is how influential books and media can shape culture.

One current trend that bothers me is the sheer volume of book titles that carry the word “F*ck!” on its title. A quick search through the search engines give us titles like:

Find your F*ckyeah, The Hidden Power of F*cking Up, What the F____, What The F*ck Just Happened... etc. Clever marketing? Attention-grabbing? In fairness, I have not read any of the titles I mentioned here, and like any book, including those that are boring, I am sure there would be at least an iota of good ideas we can pick up from. Still, I have always wondered why there is a need to use expletives to grab our attention.

How would you feel as a parent if you see your teens reading a book, and on its cover printed in bold types, is the word “F*ck” included in the title? Some parents find it cute. But how would they feel if the kids use the same word against them when they have a moment of conflict or disagreement? What would be the chances of the next generation in succeeding in business or their career when that “F” word becomes part of their daily vocabulary and expressions?

Oh, I don’t know. Perhaps I am just an old creature from the old school who believes in respect, good manners, and conduct. But as a parent I have never allowed my kids to use expletives in the way they converse. I have told them that expletives are cover ups for a shallow mind with very shallow vocabulary. Today this old-school guy has grown up kids doing successful business and career. They attract more opportunities not only because of their craft but more so because they are polite and respectful.

This is the best time for parents (especially during the lockdown) to educate and teach children good manners and right conduct. Whatever skills they would have learned, whatever competencies they would have built would one day turn obsolete. But the values, virtues, the right attitude they pick up will be the foundation for their success for their lifetime.

I love this thought from George Santayana as he says: “A child educated only at school is an uneducated child.” Parents are the best educators, and even your school faculty would not disagree with this. And do not use the “F” word anywhere in any conversation as you train them.

(Bring your family, attend and take part in a live webinar via Zoom this July 8-9, “Raising Future Leaders - Values, Virtues and Attitude with Chinkee Tan, Nove Ann Tan and Francis Kong as they present winning ideas on Money Management, Online Education and Life Skills for Success. For further inquiries or registration email: admin@successoptionsinc.com or contact April at 0928-559-1798 or Abby at 0917-533-6817.)

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