Ego is the enemy within
One of my adopted sons took me to dinner while I was in Manila the other week, visiting my son Michaelangelo and his family. He confided to me that he and his wife had not been on talking terms for two weeks already. I felt sad because I know in my heart that the culprit behind this cold treatment is the ego – a person’s sense of self-esteem or self-importance.
Kori Ellis of sheknows website says, “Ego has the role in spoiling many relationships, and it's not just a problem with people who are dating. Ego can ruin friendship and put a wedge between family members, too. If you have a string of unsuccessful relationships, you need to let go of your ego and take a step forward toward true happiness.”
Kellis exclaims, “We all have an ego. However, we must learn how to control it. If you let your ego go unchecked, it can cause tremendous turmoil in your life- particularly with your partner or spouse. Negative feelings, such as anger, resentment, fear, and jealousy are all products of the ego.”
Do you feel that your ego is calling the shot? Here are the warning signs as pointed out by the “You Have Calling website”:
You always have to have more. Do you always have to be the best, and be the best? The ego is never satisfied, and is craving more. The ego lives from fear that there won’t be enough.
You have to be right. How many times have you seen someone’s need to be right cause serious damage in a relationship? When the ego is in charge and conflict ensues the situation just gets worse.
You must always be winning and you hate losing. The ego thrives on outdoing and being the best. Achievement and accomplishment is an important piece of realization.
One may ask, "How to overcome the ego?” Our source cites the following ways:
Focus on generosity. Practice giving your time, energy, and resources. This will squelch the egos focus on “mine” and having more.
Practice loving unconditionally. When you are able to love someone or something despite what’s in for you, the ego has been transcended. Show love unconditionally and stop asking, “What’s in it for me?”
Be compassionate and kind. Help others in need and recognize how you can be of service. Be observant on how you can help others.
Encourage unity and embrace differences. Spend time and get to know someone who is different from you. When you notice judgments emerging, stop to find the value in others' uniqueness and background
Be in the present moment. The ego has a hard time content in the moment. Be careful not to get stuck ruminating on the past or worrying about the future. Be mindful of your breath, your environment, and your senses.
As a food-for-thought, Proverb 16:18 declares, “Pride goes before destruction and a haughty spirit before a fall."
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