Short but well-lived life
AJ Perez was very young — he had just turned 18 — when he was killed in a tragic road accident in April 2011. He was on his way back from an ABS-CBN roadshow in Dagupan (where STAR photographer Ver Paulino was part of the media invited to cover the event) when their van collided with a bus, killing AJ on the spot.
His untimely death was a big shock to everyone, but most especially to his family: Father Gerry, mom Marivic and younger brother Gello. They tried their best to cope with the loss, but it was understandably hard. His mom, who had stayed behind with Gello at their home in Manila, recalled what it was like for her when she first heard of what happened from her husband, who was with their son that night: “Gerry had just called to inform me of the accident. I began to cry hopelessly in anguish…” She worried about how she would tell the other members of their family. “My courage had abandoned me.”
This and other anecdotes about AJ and his so brief life have been captured by Marivic in A Smile of Hope, a book on AJ released in time for his fifth death anniversary. The book, which is co-authored by Zenaida Roy Almario and published and distributed by ABS-CBN Publishing, was officially launched recently at National Book Store TriNoma. AJ’s mom Marivic related that the idea for the book grew out of the journal she started keeping after her son passed away. Into that journal she poured all the grief she was feeling, and it eventually became the seed of the book.
“It started from my journal that became my source of strength and comfort in coping with the loss and my son’s untimely passing,” she told the assembled guests, which included AJ’s family and friends, his supporters, showbiz colleagues and schoolmates.
Writing in the journal, she said, and reading Bible passages, were a great comfort to her, to Gerry and their youngest (and now only son) Gello during that time of pain.
Coming up with A Smile of Hope was something they long dreamed of doing. It was providential that after AJ passed away, Marivic connected, through social media, with Almario, who is based in San Diego, California.
As a mother herself, Almario understood where Marivic was coming from, and within months, the germ for the book had taken root.
Initially, they called it a “project of love.” Although writing it and recalling all the memories were painful for them, ultimately, Marivic said, it gave them an opportunity to share AJ’s 18 beautiful years — his “short but well-lived life” — with people who may not have known him that well. Gerry and Marivic had to go through photos of their son’s wake and burial, talk to his friends and ask them to share their memories of him for publication in the book.
The anecdotes are raw and spring from a place of emotional honesty. If you are a mother, you will feel for her, and for the entire Perez family.
One of the most touching passages in the book reads as follows: “The night of AJ’s passing, time had continuously moved forward around us, while it seemed to have suddenly stopped for our family, making it the longest and most unsettling night of our lives…”
AJ’s father Gerry also shared in the book his thoughts on his son and what he plans to do. “Although the law of nature is not supposed to play out this way, a father outliving his son, I do take great pride in carrying on his legacy,” he wrote. “When we meet again, I hope and trust that AJ will be just as proud of me, as I am of him. Until that day, I seize opportunities to carry on his name in a positive light.”
Indeed, as parents, our children are not supposed to go ahead of us. It’s supposed to be the other way around. But when it does happen, we can always choose to leave a legacy of hope and of smiles, and we are sure that wherever he is now, AJ Perez is happy that those he left behind are doing everything they can to make that happen.
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