When you try to control everything, you enjoy nothing

"When you try to control everything, you enjoy nothing. Sometimes you just need to relax, breathe, let go and live in the moment.”

This quotation from the tinybuddha.com  is a wake-up call to all, especially those who have the urge and desire to control everything that are happening in their lives. Like family relationships, actuations and opinions of people, behavior of loved ones, health issues and many other things that one want to have control of.

Those who have the tendency of controlling everything, figuratively or literally, become exhausted and frustrated, and even disappointed.

I have learned that it is not within our power to control everything. I’ve come to realize that the best way to handle situations and people, is to accept and embrace it or just walk away from people whose behavior is beyond my control.

There are ways on how to let go of everything that we can’t control. Lori of “tinybudhha.com" cites the following tips:

Give yourself a rant window. Let yourself vent for a day before confronting the person who troubled you. This may diffuse the hostility and give you time to plan a rational confrontation.

Remind yourself that anger hurts you more than the person who upsets you  and visualize it melting away as an act of kindness to yourself.

If possible, express your anger to the person who offended you. Communicating how you feel may help you move on. Keep in mind that you can’t control how the offender responds, you can only control how clearly and kindly you express yourself.

Put yourself in the offender’s shoes. We all make mistakes, and odds are you could have easily slipped up just like your husband, father, or friend did.  Compassion dissolves anger.

Remind yourself these are only three options; remove yourself from the situation, change it, or accept it. These acts create happiness; holding onto bitterness never does.

Metaphorically release it. Write down all your stresses and toss the paper into your fireplace. 

Imagine your life ten years from now. Then look twenty years into the future, and then thirty.  Realize that many of the things you’re worrying about don’t really matter in the grand scheme  of things.

Immerse yourself in a group activity. Enjoying the people in your life may help put your problems in perspective.

Use deep breathing technique to soothe yourself and seep into the present moment

Replace your thoughts. Notice when you begin thinking about something that stresses you, you can shift your thought process to something more pleasant, like your passion for your hobby.

Laugh it out. Research shows that laughter soothes tension, improves your immune system, and even eases pain.