Trip to Nowhere

A former client of mine in a bungled film-production venture still brings up the dead project in her present conversations with friends. In her heart and mind, the lady couldn’t seem to get over the project. And there’s no sign whatsoever that she could ever let go of the idea.

Many years ago, she wanted so much to act in a movie. Together with some moneyed friends, they put up a movie company and called me in to do their first film.

I cautioned them on a lot issues, among which was the quality of talent that we had to bring to the screen. I had an inkling that the lady thought money was all that was required. And she couldn’t be more wrong.

We needed a big name to entice people to watch our movie. The lady had to be in the lead role – of course, this was the very purpose of the venture! – and she was a virtual nobody. But perhaps we could make up for her lack in public recognition by harnessing her acting skills.

She promised to me she would cooperate, that she would do anything to learn and to excel in the acting art. That sounded good. But, then, that was all she ever did – promise. Once the production process started, she was immediately giving me headaches.

That movie project never really took off. I quitted after just two shooting days. I had other, better uses for my time and effort.

“I should have nurtured my passion for acting,” the woman would now tell friends. “If I had, I would be an established movie actress by now.” What she could regret to more avail is the fact that she was such a spoiled brat with no clear direction in life. Anyone would be damned to join her in a trip to nowhere.

It must have come clear to her now that she had allowed herself to be stuck in her own fantasy world. Worse, she tends to continue holding on to prospects that had long ceased to be. It must be her mental solace from the agony of a dream that never materialized – and it can be like a gallstone, causing her life constant irritation.   

The lady better take counsel from Eleanor Roosevelt, who once said “never to clutter up your mind with might-have-beens.” Men and women of extraordinary accomplishment have learned to free themselves from the shackles of regret and, instead, use their past wrong choices and misdeeds to propel them to excellence. There’s no need holding on to something that, in fact, is never meant to be.

Every once in a while we need to check our taken direction and pattern of conduct. We need to drop what has not been working for us. Otherwise, we will just unnecessarily saddle ourselves with extra baggage.

On the other hand, there’s no use regretting wasted time and opportunities past. The past is irrevocable. But realizing our past mistakes can prompt us to start planning for a better use of our time and chances, in the present and in the future.

On rare occasions when I accidentally run into the lady, she’d still mention the movie project to me. She’d tell me how much money was lost – and friends too. When she gets to the point again of asking whether we could still push through with it, I’d just sigh and say, “Who knows?” and quickly add, “In the meantime, let’s get busy with whatever is in our hands now.” 

The trip to nowhere, if stubbornly continued, will surely lead nowhere. The failure can be avoided, or at least minimized, by stopping and changing course. Then there’s still a chance to really get somewhere.